Now you might think this post is about me but it is not. It’s about an Aussie fellow whom I have met and am getting to know which lead to the title of this article. This guy whom we’ll call Mr. Oz has been in the philippines under 5 years but more than 3 years, has a live in girlfriend whom he has taken to Oz a couple of times. Now as far as Mr. Oz knows I just arrived from the states but have been coming since 1982 and kinda figures I’m a newbie to this land of delusional enchantment and therefore offers advice. I pretty much play dumb. Advice from Mr. Oz:
1.) If you are going to get a pinay for a wife, get an orphan and one that has no interest in going to your home country. Otherwise when she gets to your country there is good chance she will take off as soon as she get citizenship, green card or such. In the event she can’t wait that long then she might accuse you of molesting her children in order to take off. Granted this is good advice from Mr. Oz who is paying for an annulment for his girl friend so he can marry her and take her and her son to Oz. But Mr. Oz says the,,,, all together now “NOT ALL FILIPINOS ARE LIKE THAT.” “SHE’S NOT LIKE THE OTHER FILIPINOS.”
2.) Never trust a filipino you don’t know. After you get to know them then be very careful about trusting them. Most filipinos don’t steal, scam (Mr. Oz words, not mine) but this keeps you out of trouble with the ones who do. Mr. Oz then goes on to tell how filipinos broke into his house and stole several items, he then put bars on his windows and tells me the area is safe. I think for the most part it is SAFER than a lot of other areas, the filipinos just noticed he had no bars and saw a free buffet.
3.) The filipinos are trying to make their country better. This said while we were looking at trash piled up and Mr. Oz saying that filipinos have very poor hygiene. I told him they have good hygiene inside their house and person but outside the house they are dirty. Mr. Oz corrects me and says they are dirty in all areas of their lives. So just how are they making their country better if they do not clean up after themselves?
4.) Most filipinos do not pissed in public as much as they use to (In a 10 minute taxi ride I counted 4 filipinos pissing in public). Mr. Oz will stand in his front yard and piss in the grass and in plain site of the house across the street.
5.) The philippines is a wonderful place to live. Make friends, make foreigner friends but also a few filipinos friends.
6.) If you go down the street and are attacked, most filipinos around will come and defend you.
7.) Don’t go to Mindanao as it’s not safe. But you can go to Davao. Mr. Oz then goes on to say that when he was in Davao his woman would not let him leave the house alone, always had 6 to 8 filipinos with him in case of kidnapping attempt.
9.) Corruption is not that bad.
8.) You don’t have to go native to have a good experience in the philippines, just learn/adapt the culture, chill and take it easy. Wife said same thing to me once to which I replied “ok, I’ll start stealing, scamming, overcharging and get 2 or 3 mistresses.” Odd thing, wife said no mistresses.
There are some more Mr. Oz has said but slipped my mind at the moment. But rest assured Mr. Oz will be offering more nuggets of wisdom which I will share with you all. Why the title you ask? Well at times when talking to Mr. Oz it seems as if he is going native without knowing it. I will bring up an experience or something I read, saw on tv and he will say it’s not like that then turn around and tell me stories that happened to him that shot down his “it’s not like that.” Mr. Oz talks like a member of PFB about experiences in the philippines then denies it’s that bad, therefore the title.Published in