This came in as a user submitted post, but it did not have a member listed as the author. I have no idea who wrote this, but thought it was a jolly good rant about the complete fucking morons of BDO. We just can’t have enough ranting about those sub-human brainless idiots at BDO. If this post belongs to you, please claim it. ~ FiloFail
I applied for a secured loan with BDO about 4 months ago, it was actually an extension of an existing secured loan, so they had all the paperwork on file already, payments on time (DIRECT DEBITS), I am a business customer of theirs with a business account.
The only question was if there was enough equity in the property of which there is plenty. Quite a simple transaction, secured loan, with more than 50% equity, paperwork already on file from existing loan, etc, most banks in Europe would fight each other for a bit of business like that, it is the bread and butter of the banking business. They agreed but needed a complete new application and re-submission of all of the original paperwork which is quite literally a mountain of crap.
Their system is from the dark ages but I live in the Philippines so it is par for the course. A few months later, after a few e-mails, any chance when this will be complete, duh, oh, scratching of heads, we need some more documents sir, we forgot our own processes and I unfortunately had my head up my asshole at the time that you applied, not a problem, just tell me what you need and I will jump through hoops like a fucking circus animal until you cunts satiate your appetite for piles and piles of shit.
Piles of shit submitted, somersaults through hoops successfully negotiated, we now have a meeting to sign, the loan has been approved, NOT FUCKING SURPRISING CONSIDERING IT IS A FUCKING SECURED LOAN YOU NUMPTY CUNTS, THERE IS NO BETTER BIT OF BUSINESS UNDER THE FUCKING SUN YOU MINDLESS REPLICANT FUCKING LIZARD CUNTS, of course no surprise when attached to the appointment e-mail is another long list of requirements and papers required (THEY CALL IT POST APPROVAL DOCUMENTS), long e-mail chain ensues to ensure that I have absolutely all of the docs they need, mission accomplished.
I knew that this would not satisfy their appetite and was uneasy on the eve before the meeting, I even said to an expat friend of mine, I am sure they are going to find some way to fuck this up. About 8 pm I get an e-mail saying that I need to get an Affidavit of Citizenship, that gives me plenty of time to get this sorted before the 10 am appointment the next day. I am sure they already had a copy of my passport which I issued to them three months ago, HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE THE FUCKING RETARDED COGS TO TURN IN THEIR SHITTY LITTLE BRAINS.
So, I show up to the meeting with a truckload of paperwork (FOR A FUCKING SECURED LOAN) the lady I was dealing with then said, I should get 30 of my buesiness contracts notarised, I told her, are you fucking kidding me, that will cost me PHP 30,000 so there will be no point getting a fucking loan you retarded, replicant, lizard cunt. So, she changes her mind about that, bearing in mind, they make this shit up as they go along. So, now everything they need has now been submitted, it is just a case of releasing the funds.
A week later when funds have not been released another e-mail from the Fucktard Universe appears, it is a miracle these cunts even have access to the interweb. Your middle name is on your passport sir, but only your middle initial is on your wedding certificate. We need a signed affidavit from you stating that your name is in fact your real name and the United Kingdom Passport Authority did not make a mistake, you need two co-affidavits, ID, three copies, signed twice, with copies of ID, shit marked toilet roll matching their DNA ET FUCKING CETERA. BANCO DEL ORO IS SO FUCKED THEY ARE A DANGER IN A SOCIETY THAT ENCOURAGES THE USE OF FIREARMS, GOD HELP US ALLPublished in