A couple months ago I’m driving down the road on my moto with my GF seated behind me. I’m wearing my helmet, and she is not…because she doesn’t want to mess her hair up. In the distance I see a LTO van pull off to the side of the road. No problem…I’ll be past these guys before they can get out of the van.
Nope…I’m about even with the van when one guy leaps out, he briefly gives me a hard look, and then I zoom on by. I’m at least 25 meters past, when I hear someone yell out something (???). The GF taps my arm and said the LTO guy wants me to pull over. For half a second I debated that I should just keep going (like most pinoy would have done), but no, I decided to do the Right Thing.
I’m a good 100 meters down the road before I can safely do a U-Turn. I get to the van, and the LTO guy is pissed…”why you no stop”. I hold back, and calmly tell him, “I turned around when it was safe.”
A second later…after his brain rebooted…blah blah blah…”Your passenger has no helmet”. Guilty…So he takes my drivers license info down, and then tells me “I keep your license, you get it back after you pay the ticket” (Do they have the authority to take your license ???)
I was basically willing to pay the fine (guilty as charged)…but when he said he was going to confiscate my license, thats when I became the “angry Kano” (I figure someone will looses it, or I will have to pay another Kano Fee to get it back) . I told him to show me the article that says he has authority to confiscate my license. He give me the “blank reboot stare” and then goes and talks to the other LTO guy. He comes back and said he will give me my license back, but I will need to sign the ticket…Ok.
Skip forward 3 months…
My drivers license expired last week, so today I head to the local LTO office to renew it. I was hoping that maybe the helmet ticket might have been lost in the Pinoy Burauracy (I still brought money to pay it off it if they ask me about it).
I fill out the paper work, take the eye test, blood pressure test, and then I’m told to wait. They call me and then tell me I have an outstanding ticket I have to take care of (I was actually kind of impressed they had computers). Ok…Guilty…”Where do I pay ???”.
Hmmmmm…now apparently I have to go 20 minutes down the road to a different office to pay the ticket.
I get to the next office, hand over my ticket and the lady tells me to have a seat. 30 mins later she calls me back to the window…”Sir, why has it taken so long to pay your ticket”. Guilty…I tell her I lost the ticket. “Sir you have to have a Notary sign for the lost ticket”…Ok
Also…”Sir you have to go to the main LTO office and take a training class”.
Hmmmmm….”Are you serriously telling me I have to go to “No Helmet school” to clear this ticket ???”…”Yes Sir”.
Hmmmm…Just so happen there is a Notary office across the road (what a coincedence). I get to the office and tell the lady at the type writer what I need. She looks at me kind of funny, and starts to type out the document.
I was still a bit pissed…so I mention that I also had to go to another LTO office to take a No Helmet class…agian she gives me a funny look…”Sir, I have a friend who can get you a certificant for a 500p VIP fee”. Hmmmm….Ok.
Everything was gettting all wrapped up (copies, signatures, and cash receipt) and the lady says if I want, she’ll also pay my ticket at the office across the street because she has a “Cousin who works there”. Fuck it…I tell her to do it.
I come back after lunch, and the Notary lady now taken care of everything.
So I headed back to the original LTO office, show them that my ticket has been cleared, 30 minutes latter they issue me another driver license.
For all this extra Effort or Special Kano attention (???)…I guess I should have just had a local Fixer take care of everything. It’s almost like they want you to brake the rules in this country.
Total Time=6 hrs, Driver License=390p, No Helmet Ticket=1775p, Notary=200p, and most importantly…No Helmet training Certificant=500p.
More fun in the Failippines.