Bullshit Detected In The Philippines. World Not Surprised.


Welcome to another edition of “It’s More Fail In The Philippines!”, where we uncover yet another fun-filled way to enjoy the benefits of full exposure fail right here in the little country that just can’t.

Today’s bit of fail comes in the form of yet ANOTHER kneejerk reaction by the Philippines government to yet another problem that doesn’t exist.

If you’re anywhere near Manila about now, you’re already dealing with the dog and pony show the rest of us recognize as a papal visit to a sad little child that’s been misbehaving and is trying to cover it up.  Street children are being gathered up and put in cages and the Pope is being led through places that have been hastily dressed up to make him think that everything is so nicely maintained here.  The cleanup I can handle.  The caging of children infuriates me while the government’s denial of it infuriates me more.  But, as usual, this is the kind of crap you’d expect from a little child trying to look good for daddy.


That’s right.  Per order of the NTC, all cellphone signals in Manila and its surroundings are shut off while the Pope is here.  This is in case anyone wanted to detonate any bombs.  REALLY!?!?  They didn’t do this crap when every other foreign leader shows up.  Just the freakin’ pope??  And why is this now MY problem?  They have 25,000 troops surrounding the Pope everywhere he goes.  You’d think they’d have enough eyes on the ground there to spot any bombs.  On top of that, the only “general threats” (as per the palace’s comments that there are no SPECIFIC threats) are from the Muslims, who typically use suicide bombing as their modus operandi….ergo, no cell phone required.

Why does this piss me off?  I’m on prepay, which means I am not getting these days back.  The Telcos don’t have to worry.  They already got paid.  The government isn’t going to compensate anyone.  Why would they?  Smart alone has over 69 million subscribers.  They just issue an apology and thank everyone for their patience.  I don’t have any, and I’m sure there’s some politicians with mistresses that aren’t feeling happy right about now as well.  Hard to coordinate a trip to Sogo without being able to text to her cheap cell phone you got your first blowjob for buying her.

Why can’t they just use common sense like the rest of the world?  Oh yeah.  This is the Bermuda Triangle of intelligence.

Published in Communication, Filipino Hypocrisy, Filipino Stupidity, Low Standards, Religion


  1. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
    Captain PFB

    Shit Kaine, you beat me to the story. I already had a draft going on it, but had to go out. Just got back and here’s the story. Anyway, it’s a good one. Nicely done. I may just publish mine anyway from my point of view.

  2. Profile gravatar of

    I’m back in the land of OZ, thank the fuck for that whilst this bull shit is going on.
    Just before I left I noted that they declared three extra public holidays around this week end so the 3rd world or is it 4th world country wont have any banks open any businesses open. WTF is it the fucking second coming, that would be fair enough.
    But Old Francis will tell he is just a MAN, well for the moment anyway I reckon he is on a elevator ride to saint hood is this pope.
    He seems like a good man,
    But he is just a man, like all men, write a cheque I’m sure the poor will love you even more.
    mmmmmmm I wonder how much the Catholic church gave for Yolanda?????