DUDE!! Where’s My Tree ?!?!

The following is from the Philippine Daily Inquirer 2June2015. The article  is an editorial called INNER AWARENESS by Jaime Licauco:

” Is it possible for a a fully grown fruit tree in one’s backyard to disappear without a trace? This is exactly what Ulderico P. Santiago of Toledo City, Cebu told me in a text message.

Mr. Santiago said his lanzones tree in his backyard which was 20 feet tall, disappeared without a trace in 2009. Less that a month later, his brood hen also disappeared from its cage. But after more than three hours the hen mysteriously reappeared in its cage. This was after Santiago pleaded to invisible forces or elements for the hen’s return.”

The writer then goes on to tell another story about a cellphone that moved on it’s own to a new location on the floor from where the owner put it while in cr. Then mentions how several items have come up missing from his office. He also talks about people disappearing in national parks in the U.S. and says the age ranges are from 2 years old to 13 years old and 70 to 80 years old.


Ok, Time for fun and logic here that will baffle the writer and most filipinos.

wheres-my-tree1.) The tree NEVER left the spot it was in since it was planted. Mr. Santiago most likely had too much Red Horse or shabu.

2.) The hen was stolen by a filipino, not an element. But one part of this does defy logic. A filipino returning something they stole!!

3.) Dipshit dropped his cellphone and did not notice UNTIL after he came out of the cr. Then made up the story to save face.

4.) Mr.Licauco, the missing items from your office WERE STOLEN by filipinos!! Mystery solved.

5.) The people who “disappeared” in the national parks GOT LOST!! 2 years old to 13 years old will most likely panic and wonder deeper into the unexplored park (Mr. Licauco says only 10% has been explored). 70 to 80 years old could very well succumb to memory loss, senile dementia as is common when we age. They got lost!!!

If anyone needs a good laugh or insight into an “educated” filipino mind, I suggest they read his articles. He must be very enlightened. After all in one of his articles he said he has conversations with the trees and grass.  Ok, I’ll solve that one too,,,,,, SMOKING TOO MUCH WEED!!!!!


Published in Filipino Stupidity


    1. Profile gravatar of beameup

      In the P.I. it’s shabu. Plentiful and cheap. Filipino manufacturers are under “police protection”, that’s why when you see a bust, it involves foreigners (mostly Chinese). That way the public is fooled into thinking that the cops are actually doing their duty.