Filipino Notary Public Idiocy – Utterly Pointless, Typically Stupid

My recent encounter with Filipino stupidity concerning Notary Public has me once again with my face in palm. It takes me back to another utterly stupid and pointless use of a notarization which BDO required. I lost my savings passbook a couple years ago, and went to request a new one. They wanted me to go to a notary public and have him notarize a written statement that I lost my passbook, then bring it back to them to receive a replacement passbook. What this essentially says is, “we don’t believe that you lost your passbook, even though we see you regularly here, even though we have verified you, have your multiple forms of ID on file, and have been a known account holder here for years, we want you to go to someone who doesn’t know you from Jack Shit and put a stamp on a paper and bring it to us, then we’ll believe you lost your passbook”. Why are Filipinos so fucking stupid??? Why???

It’s like a bunch of small children mimicking the actions of grown ups, sort of like “playing house” or “playing doctor”. They pretend the actions based on what they see and observe in the world of adults, but have no real clue as to the purpose of the observed actions or processes. They just like to pretend to be grown ups. If they’re playing “court” they’ll make make up the laws as they go along to best suit their need to win. This is the reality of how Filipinos function. They really are not concerned with logic or reason, as long as they can use the big words, and APPEAR to be functioning just like the grown-ups (or in this case, just like the intelligent people of the world), they think that will equate to actually being intelligent and purposeful.

Filipinos are, in a mental and intellectual sense, just dumb little children “playing country” or “playing society”.

They feel they can change the rules in the middle of the game. Presidents don’t know the constitutional limits of their power, and when they do something which clearly violates those limits (GMA and Chief Justice Corona), it’s not a clear cut court process, they argue and bicker for weeks at an enormous cost to the public without actually looking at what their laws state. In fact, it shouldn’t have even happened to begin with. Had anyone had any knowledge of their constitution, GMA’s last minute, skin of her teeth appointment of Corona should have been stopped in it’s tracks. What a bunch of fucking Filipino idiots.

So anyway….

I have to move again due to the fucking over I got from both Globe and PLDT when I moved into the current place I am living. So I found another place back closer into the Manila area, and one that I know has hard wired DSL line connections. But that’s not the point of this article. Now on to the bit about Notary Public.

So I sign the lease agreement. I asked for a copy of the lease agreement. (It amazes me that I have to ask for something that should be FUCKING COMMON SENSE AND COMMON-FUCKING-KNOWLEDGE.

“Sir, I will have this agreement notarized and make copies for you”

Well, first of all, let’s take a look at the purpose and function of a Notary Public:

The primary function of a notary public is to witness the execution of important documents, such as deeds, affidavits and powers of attorney. Some documents require that the party swear on oath that the information provided is accurate and that his signature is willful. The function of the notary public is to administer the oath, adding a statement to the document called a “jurat,” which lists the date of the oath, the venue it was performed, and that it was duly administered. If swearing an oath is disagreeable to the signer, the notary can also perform an affirmation, accomplishing the same essential function.

So how very typical for Filipinos to be so fucking clueless and mind-numbingly stupid

Filipino notary public idiocySo after she told me she must have it notarized, I said to her, “UUUUUHHHHHH wait a second, it’s too late for a notarization. The whole purpose of a notarization is TO WITNESS THE EXECUTION OF THE DOCUMENT, CHECK AND RECORD IDENTIFICATION AND VALIDITY OF THE TWO PARTIES, AND PLACE HIS OFFICIAL STAMP OR SEAL ON THE DOCUMENT. Having a document notarized AFTER the execution is NOT NOTARIZATION, it’s essentially NOTHING, WORTHLESS, POINTLESS, not to mention, ILLEGAL!!! Do you know that in nearly any other country, if a notary placed his stamp on such a document without having actually verified the identities of both signing parties being in his presence, logged the id numbers and got both party’s signatures in his notary log as proof they were present, then actually visually witnessed and presided over the signing of the document, he would be stripped of his authority and could no longer function as a notary public?”

“That’s not the way we do it here in Philippines sir”

Well, that very statement is THE CORE OF WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUR COUNTRY, why it’s so poor, why it’s so corrupt!!! You blatantly CHOOSE to do things that defy reason, logic, and SANITY!!!

So please tell me what is the point in this case of having this document notarized? Because it’s going to get a notarization stamp on it without actually, in the very meaning of the word “notarized”, having been notarized. You’re going to pay someone to lie on paper. To make a legal document illegal. Isn’t that extremely ass-backwards?????

“If you want YOUR copy falsely notarized, fine. I’ve never had any lease agreement notarized in this country, so we will sign TWO COPIES of this document. One for you, one for me. If you want to throw your money away on getting your copy illegally notarized, fine, that’s your dumb fucking choice. But I’m not handing over a single peso without a cash receipt for the money, and a signed original of our lease agreement right now, not later. Why?

  1. Because of “the way you do things here in Philippines”!!
  2. Because it’s COMMON FUCKING SENSE

I’ll end this post with my common signature;


Published in Blatant Stupidiy, Corruption, Filipino Stupidity


  1. Profile gravatar of Fr. Bong Bong Jolog Jun III
    Fr. Bong Bong Jolog Jun III

    It’s a pointless exercise to argue with the brain dead. I no longer even care about the “need” to be inconvenienced by having to locate, visit and pay for some worthless imbecile of a Notary to Notarize every document ever produced in this country of drones. It meets my expectation set – 100%!

    I wrote on another post about my experiences with opening a company account with BDO, and my discussions with the local branch manager about both the pointlessness and highly illegal nature of what they had asked me to do to “accomplish” in order open the account. He was of course a near complete moron, and absolutely incapable of even recognizing the existence of a problem. That type of interaction now meets my expectation set 100%, also.

    Perhaps my best ever Notary experience was with the lease on the last premises that I lived in here. I had accepted long ago that the Real Estate Broker would take the lease away for Notarization. When the agent returned the Notarized documents (two copies) to me, I noticed that some sections of the lease had been changed using whiteout. When asked about the issue, the broker admitted to “…making a mistake on the lease” and changing the documents AFTER they had been Notarized. This is a professionally trained, government licensed broker!

    Completely mindless bureaucracy is part of the Pinoy way of life. There are process to be followed with everything, none of which are directed towards outcomes which have been properly thought through – or in many cases even considered at all. I no longer even bother to ask “why” when confronted with a request for Notarization, because I know for certain that the idiot I am dealing with has NO FUCKING IDEA why. Zombies are real. The brain dead do walk among us.

    It’s more Notarized in the Failippines!

    1. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
      Captain PFB Post author

      Yep yep on that CyberGod. I find it very difficult to believe Filipinos have human brains. My logic is that they MUST have a brain to move about, utter words, and walk upright. Grizzly bears can walk upright too.

      But I can come to no other real conclusion that whatever brain that is in their skull cannot be human. It is a purely insect or animal brain operating on pure instinct alone, not reason or anything that could be remotely recognized as logic.

      Mind-boggling to say the least.

  2. Profile gravatar of Waipahukanu

    Oh Gosh, where can I start… I can relate so much! I had problems with BDO too and the BS with them. One day I went in there to withdraw funds, and I happened to get the date wrong on the withdraw slip; I think it was right after new year and I wrote in the wrong year. I left the bank with the money.. everything cool. Then, the bank called my now ex-girl friend and she got 10 missed calls on her cell phone 30 minutes after I left the branch. She asked me to call up the number and find out who it is. Ahhh, lo and behold it was the teller at the branch asking me to come in and initial my mistake on the slip. I had a brief discussion with my EX-Gf, and she told me just to in there.. bla bla bla, so I did, and then when I went in the teller reminded me of “my mistake”, and to initial the correction on the slip. There was no attempt to bear any responsibility… No “I am sorry sir for our oversight of not checking the slip before you left”. Nada zip! “Just initial here, and here sir… Thank you”. Haaa, I closed my account with BDO shortly thereafter, and prior to that had a big discussion with my ex-gf as to why it is their responsibility to check the slip, and even it was mines, they should have offered to bring the slip to where I live. But she kept on saying it is their policy to do that. And, I said what? Call up the house and pester you to come in when you make an petty boo boo on the slip. My ex-gf just didn’t want to make “trouble”. Never again BDO. Yeah they find ways. My girl friend didn’t want me to complain to the manager, as the tellers job was on the line. I just bared it, and shut my mouth when I was closing the account, and the manager asked me why. I will never forget being bugged by a BDO employee, and my loonie tunes experience there.

  3. Profile gravatar of Waipahukanu

    Well, and since this is about Notary I did have a problem once with a lost pawn ticket…. I had to go to a notary to make the declaration of a lost pawn ticket. And, that took up a whole morning. I mean c’mon… if you show the right ID with your picture on it, then what is the problem? I don’t get the point of having to get a notarized declaration of lost pawn slip!! Tada… whole morning wasted! It is so fun here!

  4. Profile gravatar of Richard aka Dick Head
    Richard aka Dick Head

    Just my 10 pesos worth of opinion.

    Notaries in the State of California aren’t even lawyers. You find notaries in UPS stores.

    In this country, you gotta be a lawyer (a member of the Philippine Bar) in order to be commissioned by an RTC or MTC Judge (I think) to practice as a Notary Public in a specific jurisdiction.

    I think this notary public thing is an antiquated pencil-pushing exercise that needs serious review.

    All important data in a notarized documents are captured and entered manually (in handwriting) into a Notarial Register which is really an official log book that a lawyer purchases from the DOJ upon presentation of his “Notary Public Commission” to the clerks at the DOJ. All documents notarized by him are entered into this Notarial Register. When it is filled up, the lawyer has to submit it to the DOJ (I think) where it is archived. In data processing, we call that a black hole – where data goes in and no organized way to retrieve it electronically. Now if they can only scan or digitize these notarial registers .. but that’s another topic. :=)

    If truth be told, it is very easy to fabricate a “notarized” document. I don’t know if anybody has even bothered to check if a “notarized” document is authentic in so far as the notarization process is concerned. As a matter of fact, any lawyer’s legal secretary can create a “notarized” document, using his boss’s credentials. She can fake the signature, no one checks its authenticity anyway. But that’s another story.

    I just read that out of the 5,000 Bar examinees last Oct 2013, about 1,700 passed. So we have 1,700 newly minted lawyers coming into the scene.

    My numbers are just SWAG’s. Maybe about 20% of the new lawyers will join the corporate world of the top 500 corporations of the Philippines, another 20% will join the government, another 20% will join a law firm as legal researchers initially, the remaining 40% will go into private practice and about half of the 40% will take on the additional title of Notario Publico or Notary Public.
    These lawyers can’t get enough clients so they become full time Notaries, just pushing and signing papers – just glorified clerks. We have legions of them in this country.

    1. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
      Captain PFB Post author

      “In this country, you gotta be a lawyer (a member of the Philippine Bar) in order to be commissioned by an RTC or MTC Judge (I think) to practice as a Notary Public in a specific jurisdiction.”

      Yet being a full fledged lawyer, they don’t actually notarize in the sense of notarizing. The very meaning of what notarizing is, is proving the people signing a document are who they say they are. This CANNOT be done if that person is not in their presence with their ORIGINAL government issued major form of Photo ID such as passport, driver’s license, etc.

      In their Notarial Register should be the signatures of those people he is notarizing, in order to prove they were there in his presence during the notarization. There should also be a photocopy of the ID’s of those he is notarizing. OTHERWISE, IT’S NOT A NOTARIZATION!!!

      So, as usual, “DEE PILIPINO WAY” is the idiotic deluded dumbfuck way.

      The reason you don’t need to be a lawyer in California to be a notary public is because IT’S NOT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND AND CARRY OUT THE SIMPLE PROCESS OF NOTARIZATION!!

      But the brain dead typical Filipino dumbfuck is no less a dumbfuck just because he managed to pass a bar exam. Most lawyers and elected officials couldn’t tell you a fraction of the laws of this country. Why? simply because they are dumbfucks.

      I mean shit man, when your president doesn’t even know the limits of his/her own powers, or the constitution, and when the Filipino shit-for-brains go to court, they don’t even know the law, they just want to argue and make shit up as they go along.

      Filipinos are still at the loin cloth spear chucking gatherer hunter stage. They have not evolved or ascended, and it is painfully obvious to the world, but not to themselves. The best they can do is pretend. Filipinos are pretending to be civilized. They are just only trying to give the illusion of order and civilization and society. But anyone from outside, once they come here, will see within a few days of their arrival that these people are just a bunch of neanderthals pretending to be grownups. Third grade school children from any industrialized nation could run this country better, and there would be process,progress,procedure, and order.

      Saying you have to be a lawyer in this country to be a notary means nothing. Lawyers in this country know nothing about the law. They were just taught how to pass the bar exam. That’s it. And according to the stats you mentioned, 3300 of 5000 couldn’t even manage to pass.

      Idiots. Plain and simple. Brainless fucking dumbshits.

      1. Profile gravatar of Richard aka Dick Head
        Richard aka Dick Head

        “The reason you don’t need to be a lawyer in California to be a notary public is because IT’S NOT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND AND CARRY OUT THE SIMPLE PROCESS OF NOTARIZATION!! ”

        That’s exactly my point Filofail in a sort of sarcastic way. A notary public is a simple clerical/administrative function. One of my younger sisters is a notary in the US, and she’s not even a lawyer.

        Why one has to be lawyer in order to be a Notary here in the Philippines is totally beyond me.

        On second thought, perhaps the notary public function is the Filipino way of providing some Filipino lawyers who are too dumb to even win a simple rent collection case to earn a decent living shuffling and signing papers. As you put it “Dee Pilipino Way ! :=) Have a nice weekend.

        1. Profile gravatar of Fr. Bong Bong Jolog Jun III
          Fr. Bong Bong Jolog Jun III

          My guess would be that the DOJ may have taken the view that only permitting lawyers to be Notaries would (in theory) reduce opportunities for undesirables to corrupt the integrity (nice joke, huh) of the system. This is because lawyers must be admitted to the bar, thus ensuring (again, in theory) a lack of prior criminal convictions, and due to registration requirements make them easier to locate the Notary if a document they notarized is called into question.

          Of course, this being the Failippines, a land of imbeciles and thieves, the system for Notarizing documents does not achieve the purposes that a reasonable person might assume it was originally established to achieve. What the country now has instead is a system that appears on the surface of it to provides a means of ensuring the integrity of legal and other official documents, but which in reality fails to deliver in any way on the purposes for which one can only assume it was established.

          Ornamental fruit. Looks great on the table, but serves no useful function whatsoever. That is Failippines law, through and through.

    2. Profile gravatar of Johnny

      Their notarizations are just basically sprinkling fairy dust on them. They really are meaningless since the attorney/ notary does not even verify the people actually signing it. Just show him a couple of ID’s and he will sign off on it no matter if the date is off or who is there.
      Ever been to a law office where all they do is notarizations? They have stacks of paper all over the place with no filing system at all and none of the paperwork has any meaning.
      However, these “power of attorneys” or “sales deeds” that are notarized become the life-blood of theft and estafa. So many properties have been stolen with these stupid attorneys and notaries.
      Just like you said, they have no idea what their own rules are and when the rules are broken, it takes them costly years to figure it out. When a property is stolen through fraud, the victim has to go to court for 5-10 years figuring it all out despite all the basic, prima-facie evidence to stop the transaction or return it back to the victim immediately.
      We had a couple of instances with fake POA’s. The sales were fake, signatures forged, and the notary never submitted the copy to the DOJ archives (to keep his name out of possible trouble). So even with a certificate saying “no record of this sale exists” and with an NBI certificate saying the siggnatures are fraudulent, the court case will still take another 5 years. So in the meantime, the asshole who stole it gets to enjoy it longer, sell it (unless the victim pays to put a lis pendens on it), or can simply let squatters take over.

      You are correct, its like they are kids playing gov’t. The only thing they really care about is the image of a functioning society, but have no idea what builds an actual society.

  5. Profile gravatar of FAFI

    I apologize in advance for reading this post late, but this article didn’t relate to me until now, which is why I chose this time to read your article on the Notary Republic here. As for the lease, I never had to get a lease notarized before in my home country (America, but it is still fucked up in it’s own way.) As for here, my current and last condo unit owners I have rented from did mention having to notarize the lease, which I still haven’t received a copy of yet. I’m still waiting on the one I signed last month on March 15th. But notary didn’t apply to me until last week while I was handling some enrollment paperwork for a student attending the college I am at. Just for the record, there is an incentive program for referring students, which is why I am handling another person’s enrollment documents.
    OK, back to the story. Since I am familiar with the enrollment process, I was given the liberty to obtain the necessary documents necessary, and to do that, I needed a notarized letter of authority notarized. These were the instructions told to me:

    1. Type out the letter
    2. Have it signed by me and the other student
    3. Take it to the BOI and get it notarized.

    Due to my past experience in notarizing a duel signature document, both parties must be present during the signing of the document/contract. Now that I think about it, my lease agreement (that I never got) would also fit into the same category. And if you were notarize a photocopy of a document or ID, the original must be present as well, correct me if I’m wrong. So how is it that I was able to get my letter of authority and passport copy notarized last week? I had my original passport, but the notary lady who collected the documents that needed to be notarized told me not to worry about giving her the original passport, she just simply walked away with my papers, and returned 5 minutes later with a notary stamp on them. Wow, Philippines is so wrong, corrupted, and shady beyond disgust. It’s like everything I was taught that was wrong in life, is not right, and vice-versa. My parents don’t believe me, they just think I am the problem. What the Fuck!!!

    1. Profile gravatar of FAFI

      Just for the record, I did plan ahead and did scan the lease to my computer prior to handing it back because I don’t trust the bitch owner of my new condo unit, I know Filipinos will try to fuck you first chance they get. I paid 1 month advance, and 2 months worth the rent for the direct deposit. I really don’t expect to get my 2 months worth of money back since I seriously had to fight to get the last one back, but I still have my copy as proof. I dare this bitch to try and alter the lease agreement.

  6. Profile gravatar of FAFI

    LOL at the last part….. Filipinos Are Brainless Idiots. Hahahaha, reminds me of my name, “Filipinos Are Fuckin Idiots.” = FAFI

  7. Profile gravatar of TheD

    Dont mention Globe and PLDT. PLDT are lying skum and Globe committed fraud against us. We ordered X and Y from Globe, they delivered X Y and Z. I told them I didnt order Z, they told me it comes with the package. Also Globe state that 200 pesos per month for 5 months is 1200 pesos. I spent 45 minutes on the phone with them explaining that 5 x 200 = 1000 and not 1200, but they REFUSED to accept it. I asked for a manager to call me back and they told me he would. 4 months later, no call and the collections department are calling me to ask me to pay a bill I can not access as the fucking passwords they gave me do not work so I can not open the bill. I reported this to the, they gave me an issue number and never did shit about it yet they expect me to pay a bill I can not access.