Filipinos Are Great Teachers Of Idiotic Business Practice

It truly surprises me that huge, reputable companies like Sony put their name in the hands of idiot Filipinos. If you want your service standards to plummet to all-time lows, put your business in the hands of Filipinos. They are completely incapable of following anything that remotely resembles corporate standards.

Anytime you entrust anything to a Filipino, everything important flies out the window, and is replaced by their standards of laziness, inconvenience, sheer ignorance, corruption, shitty service, and filogic (opposite of logic). Nothing is important to the Filipino except his individual self.

If Filipinos in general weren’t such unbelievably stupid clueless idiots who don’t have the slightest clue about customer service and inventory, Filipino retailers could easily increase their sales and profits by leaps and bounds. But they constantly shoot their profit margins in the foot by not adhering to one simple elementary no-brainer concept: KEEP THE PRODUCTS YOU SELL IN STOCK!

We have addressed this a few times before on Philippine Fail Blog. We all know that whenever we’re going out to purchase a few things that we need or want, there’s a 97% probability that at lease one of the items we are going out to buy will be OUT OF STOCK. Yes, we’re used to it. We expect it. And keeping our expectations of quality, service, and satisfaction as low as possible when in Philippines is key to keeping our levels of disappointment as low as possible. It also helps us get excited and happy when something that is taken for granted in most of the world happens here. It’s always a great day when I can return home from my shopping errands with everything I had on my list of things to buy, because it happens so rarely.

Sony Philippines promo FAILI have been wanting to buy a new camcorder for the past several months, and I’m really glad I waited. A few weeks ago I saw an ad on Sony Philippines website. It was a trade-in promotion.

“Trade in your video or still camera, (working or non-working) and get as much as p12,200 discount.”

PERFECT! My nearly 10 year old camcorder stopped working several months ago, and I decided now is the time to buy.

My excitement dulled my rule of keeping expectations low, and I grabbed my old camcorder and out the door I flew to go take advantage of this offer which only runs from Feb 8 to March 16, 2014. It was mid-February at the time I went to take advantage of the offer, just a few days since the beginning of the promo.

I arrive at a Sony Retailer at SM Mall, old non-working camera in hand. (I’m sure you’re ready to hear the typical idiocy now)

“Sorry sir, you must go to the Sony Service Center to trade in your old camera and receive a voucher for the discount.”

I should have known. Honestly, I really should have expected that Filipinos would make this offer AS UTTERLY INCONVENIENT FOR THE CUSTOMER AS THEY POSSIBLY COULD. What fucking god damn sense does that make??? Why can’t you just take my trade in here, and at the end of the promo period send all the trade-ins to the service center???? You’re a Sony Retailer, it says SONY on the sign at the entrance of this shop, WHAT THE FUCK MAN???

“Sorry sir, it’s our policy”

No, “Making things as inconvenient as possible for customers” is your idiot policy. And you calling UTTER FUCKING STUPIDITY “policy” doesn’t make it reasonable, logical, or conducive to sales. Yes, in my haste, I overlooked the page on the website which explains this, but regardless, it’s no less an inconvenience to have to go to two different locations to take advantage of a promo. Especially in Philippines traffic!!! That makes this purchase an ALL DAY EVENT. In the USA, I can buy a god damned car faster than buying a camera in Philippines via a camera trade-in promo.

Suggestion to Sony: Since you also list all of the participating outlets, could you not have made arrangements with the outlets to accept trade-ins, and a plan to pick up all the trade-ins at the end of the promotion??? HELL NO! THAT WOULD BE TOO MUCH CONVENIENCE FOR THE CUSTOMER! AND WE CAN’T HAVE THAT IN PHILIPPINES NOW CAN WE?

It gets more stupid…..not surprisingly

So, I have dropped off my old camcorder and received my voucher which took 2.8 hours. I head back to the Sony Outlet as SM and present my voucher, and my choice of the 4 models to choose from.

Here it comes…the phrase we hear so often in this land of imbeciles:

Sony Handycam - out of stock

This is where I blew my stack.

Apparently, the fucking stupid Filipino imbecile that told me 3 hours ago that I have to drop off my trade-in at a Sony Service Center didn’t feel it was pertinent to tell me they were out of stock ON MY INITIAL VISIT. He knew I would be back with the voucher. Yet the brainless Filipino turd, as all stupid Filipinos do, just didn’t think.

So my next question was obvious.

WHY DO YOU RUN A PROMOTION AND NOT HAVE STOCK???? It’s just a few days since the beginning of the promotion!! Do you think it would have been a good idea to have stocked up a bit in preparation for this promo you imbecile? But hey, yeah it’s a huge inconvenience for me, but once again, you fucking brainless Filipino dimwits are losing sales by the dozens because you are OUT OF STOCK.


So I went to 3 OTHER PARTICIPATING OUTLETS to see if I could use this voucher and get a camcorder.

Take a guess…


So at the final location I visited, I demanded to speak with the highest level of management. I gave him my unkind thoughts and devastatingly constructive criticisms about their dumbshit Filipino idiot preparations for promotions. I told him I want a fucking Sony Handycam, and I want it at the promo price.

He agreed to locate one for me.

“Sir, I will contact you to give you…”

Then he said that fucking word. That word that makes you cringe every time they say it. That word they use every time they fuck up. That word that is grotesquely over used and never given:

Feedback in Philippines means "You won't hear from me again".

It’s now almost mid-March. I have not heard from the stupid Filipino turd. And I still don’t have my Handycam.

DISCLAIMER: This article was NOT written to shock anyone. Because nobody will be shocked by this. This kind of PHILIPPINES FAIL is standard.


Published in Blatant Stupidiy, Filipino Customer Service, Filipino Stupidity


  1. Profile gravatar of

    I just don’t understand it Filo…

    Not too long ago a friend of mine was visiting from Dubai and was enamored with my furniture which we had made by a family owned business that my wife found in Market Market not too far from my house. He was actually willing to buy the set that we had but I took him to the shop so he could meet the owner and inquire about getting a set of his own made and possibly shipped to UAE – he was willing to pay whatever the cost (shocking I know…) We get there and he is ready to purchase the set displayed ON the floor ON the spot – CASH MONEY. The owner says no…why not? You got it..”OUT OF STOCK” he says. But…what about THAT set right there on the floor in front of me. “Impossible sirrr…its display set” he says. YES – WE WILL PAY. I WANT IT. “Out of stock sir” he says again. So they go round and round and Im just smacking my head repeatedly from the impossible stupidity. Finally I step in and ask how long would it take for them to MAKE this set and could they ship to Dubai. Amazingly he says they can make it and ship to UAE. My friend is ok with that and the owner asks for his contact details saying he will email him within the week when its ready. This was almost ONE YEAR AGO! My friend was willing to pay FULL price for custom made wood furniture and the cost of shipping to UAE. No contact..nothing from the shop owner after that visit.

    So my wife and I were browsing in that same area about two weeks ago and we run into that shop owner. “Hey – your friend never called!” he says. Yeah..he was waiting for YOU to email him when the furniture set was ready! You won’t believe what he said next..”AHHHH – out of stock sir” and shook his hands (you know how they do…)

    I told the whole story (again) to my wife about the whole situation. Her reply? “But why didn’t your friend call?”

    Im surrounded by idiots…

    1. Profile gravatar of Fr. Bong Bong Jolog Jun III
      Fr. Bong Bong Jolog Jun III

      The only thing that surprises me about that story is WHY you ever imagined you’d be able to purchase the display stock to begin with. I’ve had the same experience repeatedly. I used to often take things a step further and ask WHEN they expect to have new stock. It’s amazing how often I’ve been told “…I don’t know if we will get more of this item Siiiir”. Not sure? What the fuck are they doing hanging onto display stock of an item that they are “…not sure” they will ever have in stock again? Filogic is the only thing that can possibly explain it. For more reasonable people like me, there is just no logical explanation.

      1. Profile gravatar of

        Dude you know as well as I do that a Filipino would sell you his Mother AND Father if the price was right. But this was a boutique-ish type handmade furniture place where you just point at what you want and buy it off the floor. In hindsight Im pretty sure the set my friend wanted was already sold to someone else, but you know the credo here – “Give the least amount of information at all times when asked. Accurate information is unnecessary and considered a bonus if given.”

  2. Profile gravatar of Fr. Bong Bong Jolog Jun III
    Fr. Bong Bong Jolog Jun III

    Not something I’d have bothered with FiloFail. It was always a recipe for disaster, because you knew right from the start that somebody, somewhere was going to have to stretch their tiny intellect just a little, and then do something just a bit out of the ordinary – and that somebody was going to be a Pinoy. I’d have ordered something online and paid C.O.D. – totally not worth the hassle to do what you bravely did.

    1. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
      Captain PFB Post author

      I know, I know @CyberGod but as I said, my excitement dulled my senses. That was a complete waste of a day. Just utterly mind blowing then unimaginable stupidity one will surely experience everywhere you go, with everything you do, and with everything you buy or try to buy.

      Calling Filipinos “fucktard” is a compliment to them. They are far beyond the reaches of even being a fucktard. I honestly find it hard to believe they have a human brain.

      1. Profile gravatar of Joshua

        March 16 is only a few days away. What will you do now? Insist on getting that handycam or just keep the voucher, never to get into any promotions or stuff in the country, then just buy a new one online, wasting an opportunity for getting a new handycam with a discount.

        1. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
          Captain PFB Post author

          I forgot to mention that the manager notarized my voucher that at his store, the voucher will not expire. He will honor the voucher. I called him yesterday and after lambasting him for the lack of “Feedback”, he said he has more on order and will be arriving in about two weeks.

          We’ll see. I am going to wait, not expecting much, simply because it makes for good Philippine Fail Blog content.

          1. Profile gravatar of Fr. Bong Bong Jolog Jun III
            Fr. Bong Bong Jolog Jun III

            FiloFail, it isn’t his fault. I’m sure that he would have forwarded your concern to the appropriate department for follow-up, but they failed to provide him with feedback. Now he’s in a position to endorse and escalate your concern, which will be coordinated to the proper department for further feedback, which he will follow up with you – you’ll no doubt have his personal guarantee of that – the man’s word is his bond! I’m sure too that he was “…very sorry for the inconn-veeen-yence Siiiir”. I have no idea what your problem is?!

  3. Profile gravatar of HawkEye

    As i have said before buy online from the US where deals are much better. Then ship to johnny air cargo new york who then ships here at great rates. No duty or vat on the goods. Just vat on their cargo cost.

  4. Profile gravatar of CebuBear

    Oh what fun you had playing ‘buy the new cam corder’, FiloFail! I’m surprised you got the voucher without any more hassle than hours of back and forth travel. A bit like buying an ice cream at Gaisano in Talisay. First you line up behind the other brain dead shoppers queuing for the ice cream, then you are told you need to pay the ‘carsh-eeeer sorrrr’ over there, hiding behind that other long line of lovers of ice cream and any other item being sold just outside the ‘barhg-ging’area of the supermarket. So you line up with them, pay for your ice cream purchase and get a ‘chit’ ‘issued’.

    A bit like buying an item in one of the departments where they must first test it to prove to the incredulous but yet loyal Gaisano shopper that it works (you can’t even buy a frigging light bulb without them taking twenty minutes of your life away to prove the thing works)then they must ‘issue’; which means writing some scribbles on a piece of torn off paper so pulp-like you can see the tree still in there, which is taken by the carsh-eer and eventually some woman over 25 and married ie; beyond the limit of employability because every true Filipina once 25 will be married and bringing up more zombie wanna-bes, will add it to the list of the day’s takings and the books will be in order. Forget the barcoding system used for all the food items, this is from the hardware department and so they can’t for some reason known only to the gods of retail in da pilipeens, add it to the system and simply scan the friggin thing. No. Must issue.

    Meanwhile, back in the ice cream line… you finally get there and order a vanilla cone for your three year old only to be told that after nearly twenty minutes messing about they are ‘out of stock, sir!’ “Out of stock? Of vanilla? Perhaps the most popular flavour in the world?” “Sorreeee sorrrr” You might get the local MENSA candidate who will use his initiative and suggest another flavour but usually he will stare at you, open mouthed to show his consternation and thus empathy with your plight. Frustrated, especially since your 3 year old is getting toey, you scan around for anything that might change this scenario and you spot in the freezer next to the empty vanilla tub, an unopened tub marked, wait for it…. ‘Vanilla’!

    You point this out to the lad who is, after all, on a 6 month contract at the end of which he will write a letter of resignation praising his manager for teaching him so much in the vain hope he will be re-hired yet really it is so the employer doesn’t have to pay him benefits and obey labor laws because, well he resigned, right? But I digress. The lad doesn’t look at the unopened tub. If he did that might mean he would have to acknowledge they are not ‘out of stock’ and that is against the laws of humanity, Pinoy Retail Style. You ask why doesn’t he open that tub and he will look you in the eye and say he can’t. Why not? “Not issued yet, sorrrrr”.

    You can’t kill them all. There are millions of them and you’d get through a couple of dozen before they would lock you up and you simply couldn;t carry enough bribe money to keep getting out and continuing on with the lord’s work….it’s impossible…mumble, mumble…..

    1. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
      Captain PFB Post author

      I know Bear, and the reason this article didn’t appear until a couple weeks after it happened is because I needed to get over my guilt and shame for even considering that I would be coming home with a camera.

      Fuck man, it was an amazing success story that I even got the voucher. But you are all correct. Shame on me for thinking this was going to work out.

      I decided to post the article because I could not live with the guilt and shame any longer. It was time to face the music and face the well deserved beating from my friends here at Philippine Fail Blog.

      Honestly, I had it coming.

      1. Profile gravatar of CebuBear

        Confession is good for the soul, my son. Now, in true Filipino fashion, say ten hail marys, make a statement of contrition and in no time at all you will be re-elected no matter how many billions you have… oh, sorry, I have been counseling a local politician. Got you two mixed up. Still, you were temporarily blinded by a flashback to common sense and logic, consumer protection and sensible retail practices. It happens to all of us, nothing to be ashamed of… well, not really ashamed. Good luck!

  5. Profile gravatar of Richard aka Dick Head
    Richard aka Dick Head

    It’s (Trade-In Promo) a cheap gimmick to attract unwary customers. They make it look so easy but once you get into their “process”, your struggle begins. They will need this or that, or anything that will make it difficult for you to take advantage of their promo. Most of the time these promos are prematurely leaked to friends or relatives of people working in these companies, to give them a head start. They will even instruct their friends/relatives the easy way to get the claims processed. I don’t think it’s a idiotic business practice. It’s a typical syndicate/cartel type of operation.

    1. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
      Captain PFB Post author

      Then why advertise it publicly? I see it as idiotic business practice. Run a promo and don’t stock up in preparation of it. Hell, they barely keep any stock under any circumstances. I’m sure nobody did a fucking thing to prepare for this promo.

      Everything was as said on the website. It was my ignorance for not reading first before running to take advantage of it regardless of the fact that even though they fully disclose the process, it’s still a senseless inconvenience for the customer.

      But the clencher is the OUT OF STOCK just days into the 5 week long promo.

        1. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
          Captain PFB Post author

          If this is common, they still shoot their profits in the foot by not allocating enough stock for the public AFTER the “cartel” scenario plays out. That is just like saying, “I don’t want to make any more profits, I’ve made enough.”

          Anyone with a brain would be saying, “Fuck man, look at all these people wanting to buy, and I don’t have stock, what a dumbfuck I was for not stocking enough.”

          But as fucking stupid as the massively overwhelming majority of Filipinos are, they just say, “sorry sir, out of stock. Too bad for you.”

          I say, “Nope. Not too bad for me, I’ll go order online and get one, and someone else will get the profit from my sale, not YOU shit-for-brains Filo dumbfuck. So it’s actually too bad for YOU idiot (or DickHead…same difference).”

        2. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
          Captain PFB Post author

          Just doesn’t make any sense at all “cartel”, “friends and family”????? WTF???,

          fuck man, it’s idiot business practice either way. Don’t be such a dick head.

  6. Profile gravatar of CebuBear

    The thing is, it IS idiotic business practise, to us, however let’s look at this from their perspective. First of all the sheer scope of the promo is daunting and requires meetings, many, many meetings. Each meeting will have its own hierarchy and pecking order. Often times the agenda will have nothing to do with the promo and everything to do with asserting one’s position in the food chain.

    Having worked in a large corporation in Cebu, I have first hand experience of how these things go down. Now while we think someone would be the bunny in charge of making sure every outlet has sufficient stock of the promo range, this might be little more than one pinoy asking another, around the table full of managers and titled people full of their own self-importance; “Do all your stores have sufficient stock or do we need to top up inventory?”

    At this point the manager in charge of the inventory will assure the manager in charge of dispatch/supply that they do, because anything else suggests they are inefficient and we know, no self-inflated pinoy middle class manager type can ever be accused of incompetence. Only the lower classes are incompetent but we forgive them because they are like our children and we treat them that way. Just like the church treats everybody bar the wealthy that control them.

    So now the assurance has been given that yes, all the stores have sufficient stock (because surely to say no or ‘I’ll check’ would be to admit incompetence), there is no way on God’s 7,000 islands of fun in the sun Bong Bong Rivales III is going to confess in front of his peers he was making it all up. He will pray to God that all will be well and if he is caught out he will blame someone else in true Pinoy fashion.

    So now we have the promo kicking off and the ads are out there at great expense and along comes some dumb fuck kano, or worse, a coco-kano (brown on the outside but just as white on the inside, ie a pinoy brought up in the US)who simply doesn’t get the concept. This is not about him…. this is not about getting a great deal, a new Sony product (in this case) and a chance to develop brand loyalty and an ongoing customer relationship. No, this is all about Bong Bong being able to swell his dib dib with pinoy pride in front of the whole management group and assure everyone he has his department well under control.

    Now, what happens when the multi-million peso promotion doesn’t sell as many cameras as they had forecast? We blame the marketing department who pass the buck to the outside advertising agency that bought the media placings and, since nobody is related to them or has any utang na loob with them, everyone can safely unload every little screw up under their umbrella on the chosen scape goat de jour. Now this might seem unfair but fear not for it won’t stop anyone using the agency again, in fact now they will have utang towards the agency for using them as the said scape goat. When the next promo comes along they will get the job because everyone will conveniently forget to remind anyone of the previous schemozzle, which everyone knows wasn’t really the fault of the agency anyway and, as with re-electing a politician who has been sacked for ripping off billions, it is gods way to forgive and so we will all be blessed etc, etc, etc.

    So at the next meeting the supply manager will ask the store inventory control manager, “Do your stores have enough stock?” and he will reply….

  7. Profile gravatar of Marius O.
    Marius O.

    I was too depressed reading this to ROFL, but my little shrivelled soul was ROFLing inside.

    I’ve worked in Asia for quite a while and come across similar things in other countries, so I’m vaguely used to the concepts Bear describes. However, nowhere except the Philippines have in encountered all of those dysfunctional behaviours all rolled into one recipe for fuckuperry, then hyped up on steroids and let loose into the world of business.

    I’m curious if any of you posters have ever managed to run a SUCCESSFUL business without being brought low by this sort of nonsense? Has anyone ever tried to (say) run a store with Western methods, wherein ordinary employees are entrusted with stock and cash management because (a) it’s the efficient way and (b) normal people will do the job faithfully instead of just stealing everything. What was the outcome?