I fixed this…vote for me!

As many of us know, there’s only one way to get potholes fixed in the US.  That’s simply to get a politician to hit it just once…maybe mess up a tie rod end….and that pothole will be fixed within a day.  Hell, most towns will have a provision to pay for repairs to your car should it be damaged going over a pothole.  The theory is:  Your taxes pay to keep the roads up, so it’s their fault that the pothole was there.  I like that.  It carries with it a sense of ownership on the part of the town.

But, of course, we are here and not there.  And here is the land of wackiness and failed logic.  Over here, the thought is:  It was your fault you were driving.  It was your fault you ran over it.  It was your fault that we’re too busy sitting around out of sight so we can get paid to do nothing.

And to be honest, I almost prefer it that way.  WHAT?!?!

Yep.  I almost do.  Even though I nearly shed a tear for my car every time I hit one (one even cost me a new transmission), I don’t think I could tolerate a politician hitting one and vowing to repair it.  Why?  Because Barangay Representative “JoJo “Gimme Money” Flipejo just can’t get something fixed without plastering his “generosity” all over the place around it.  So if it means seeing a thousand less tarps with his beady little eyes staring down at me as he brags about being the most generous guy in the world, then it’s worth it to hit that pothole a hundred more times.

Please don’t fix my potholes.  I’ll just learn to drive better.  I promise.

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  1. Profile gravatar of

    Roads here have self-healing/repair capabilities, it fix itself with dusts/muds/ accumulated over time due to inaction of repairs. I am sure that such problems will be fixed atleast 3 months before election time (My criteria for election season has already begun) accompanied w/”Your money works for you” like signboards.

    By the way… roads here expires atleast a year before election, as a citizen this is not new to me. Sorry to say you just have to drive better :(… and yeah that seems stupid…

  2. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
    Captain PFB

    This is hilariously true! Look at barangay basketball courts, they will always have the idiot’s name who used THE PEOPLE’S MONEY to build it plastered somewhere on the facility.

    Remember when the big hurricane hit? The fucktard politicians took money to print labels with their fucking idiot faces and names to plaster on the relief supplies THAT WERE SENT OVER FROM ABROAD.

    Such shameful morons.

  3. Profile gravatar of CGM@BGC
    [email protected]

    On the (very slightly off-topic) topic of “holes in the road” …..

    Here in BGC, we have constant issues with contractors digging-up the road to install new cables to service the ever-increasing number of buildings that are going up. Shouldn’t they have planned for this? Yup, but that would involve forethought and, well, that’s just sillytalk.

    So they recently dug a trench/strip running two lanes (out of four) across the road. The strip is about 2 feet wide, bout six foot deep.
    As you’d expect, it took them a few days : two men working with a couple of shovels (!) , six workers just watching, plenty of locals watching and taking photos coz, well, it’s a bit exciting to see a hole being dug in the road.

    Then, they had to cover their proud new trench so they bring out those massive plates of steel and lay them on the road.
    You know the ones, the ones that rattle-and-bang whenever a car or bus drives over them. The ones that turn into ice whenever they’re wet. The ones that move on the roadway due to the traffic and end up sliding into the holes that they are meant to cover.

    So, they lay down two massive plates of steel but, who would’ve though, they’re not QUITE long enough to cover the whole trench and they leave a nice little uncovered hole in the road (at the end of the plate) that just the perfect size for a car/bike tyre to fall into. Clearly, no-one thought to measure the fcking hole before bring the plates to the site.

    I walk past this in the morning and think “Oh shit, that’s gonna cause some trouble today” and I, being a community-minded person, mention it to a BGC Guard who is standing nearby with, as usual, his hand on his empty holster.

    And guess what ! On the way home from the Office I walk past the same place and the dangerous hole is now covered !

    Now, you’re thinking that this is good. This is a sign that they have done something intelligent. Where’s the punchline ?

    Did they bring an additional steel plate to cover the hole ?

    Nope, they moved the existing plates along a bit and now the uncovered hole is at the other end, still waiting for something to fall into it. I could be wrong but I believe that the Latin term for Filipino is Dumbus Fuckus ?


    1. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
      Captain PFB

      They have absolutely no concept of safety. If someone gets hurt by the hazard, it will be their own fault for not watching for hazards.

      Dats de way we do it here in de pilippines!