So I Wanted A Filipina Wife.

I am so let down.  I lived for 5 years in Saudi Arabia with my Dad’s work for the American Govt.  We had several Filipino families who were OFW and they were great to us.  Last year around July I was so burned out over my school and working two jobs I broke down.  I am an ex-alcoholic who decided to go back to school and I have worked hard for my IT degree.  I fell back into drinking then and I had a breakdown.  I started thinking about the Filipino people I knew ” Nice family”, and wanted this sort of a wife.

I am 39 now and never married.  I am handsome 5’8″ tall.  Not a big American.  I met a woman who was 29 at the time.  She was more interesting than the other girls.  They ranged from 18 to about her age. we became serious and decided to date each other exclusively.  So I had to get off the site.   I decativated my account on Christian Filipina and was totally honest.  I sent her flowers for Her Birthday in September, Christmas and for Valentines day.  She was moody a bit short with me and I thought it had to do with bad past relationships.  I finally decided in May of 2014 that I would travel to see her in Manila and we would go to Borocay then her province to meet the family.  I showed up at 1:30 am after a 24 hour flight with layovers to Manila.  It was the worst Airport I have seen.

I knew her for  8 months on the Website Christian Filipina before we made the trip.  The trip seemed good.  I am thinking we are both in love.  When I get back I am totally screwed with school.  I shouldn’t have taken the trip I am kicked out…. one semester left to graduate and I have no money… I lose one of my jobs so my budget is screwed.  She seems to not care.  Well in September she is being wierd.  Starts messing with me… Says ” I love you… even if you have no Dick.”  Then hangs up on skype.  I am just scratching my head.

Then she and her best friend come online skype and She says ”  You have small dick! lolool.ol.”  I am not a big guy, but I am not a shrimp.  This is their idea of white guys and her ex was 6′ 8″ Black American.  So we had a fight.  She God upset with me because she loved me deeply, but I “hated” her.  I almost burned down my Aparment and ended up in the burn unit after we had our fight.  She didn’t call me because we were “Seperated” for a while.  No empathy.  So Finally she contacts me again and I make her write a letter.  It is sweet and shows she has a brain, but then She is always watching videos when she talks to me… Turns out they are hardcore porn vids.  Funny videos she says.  So now I get her attitude.  I am pissed off because she asked me if I am A born Again Christian before she insulted me.  Seems a bit evil.  Then my friend commited suicide in November and she said nothing.  I think I may not have love here.


Published in Cultural Rudeness


  1. Profile gravatar of Eggely

    I think you have to be really careful. Most of the women in PH are not really nasty but for the most part do not know any better. They have been brainwashed by Catholics or the INC, malnourished and badly educated.

    Its possible to be lucky, as I think I was, but on the whole I think there are many better places to find a wife. Certainly my wife has put me off of any Filipina for life – not because she is bad – rather the opposite. But being 5’6 tall (and not a ladyboy) and partly Chinese she seems to have escaped the worst of the indoctrination. Her family are minor politicians and I don’t think too corrupt. Not sure about the 50 Fighting Cocks though!

    I think the first opportunity you have to take the Flip out of FlipLand and be prepared for some heavy education.

    1. Profile gravatar of Mike

      Just wait. You know how filipinos like to out do each other. Besides, the new year just started. I myself cannot wait to see what dumb fuckery they come up with this year.

  2. Profile gravatar of Sarah

    “Then she and her best friend come online skype and She says ” You have small dick! lolool.ol.”

    You should have replied, “I could stick both of my hands inside you and still be able to clap”. 🙂
    Ok that was wicked. But hey, the bitch was an uneducated lowlife who don’t deserve respect. Don’t destroy your life for a lowlife like her. You are lucky you did not marry her or got her pregnant. I would say, you escaped by the skin of your teeth. Just be careful next time.

  3. Profile gravatar of Idiotocracy

    We have all heard the old saying, big woman, big pussy. Little woman, all pussy.

    eh, there are some good ones out there but the chances of meeting one online are pretty slim unless you know how to write a profile that keeps the turds away from the intake screen. In my experience you find the good ones out in the provinces and they are usually dirt poor and not able to afford even the internet cafe unless it is a very limited time. Lots of girls will put up a profile for their friends too in order to keep costs down.

    After three years running a business over there I’d put the percentage of decent people at a conservative ten to fifteen percent, and the truly good people at half of that. Even then they will have a few blind spots in their thinking simply out of not ever being in a position where they had a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of. And good now doesn’t mean good or decent tomorrow if they get money faced as they say there. Never forget that stupid is stupid and they can easily be talked into crap by “friends” and start thinking they got it bad when they really have it very good.

    For what my advice is worth, if I had to do it again, I’d either shoot for one of the middle class Pinays that has her act together, lots slimmer pickings there, or go for a fixer upper that had good morals and empathy, then count on spending a lot of money getting her healthy, rotten teeth repaired, an ID card in most cases, and being patient till you educate here to the point she knows how well she has it. Lots of crap that needs unlearned. Set it in stone on day one, not “giving” shit to anyone because they are family except kids and those that aren’t capable of taking care of themselves and even then do your part and no more.

    But dude, no disrespect, but you got some issues of your own that you need to get under control before you take on anyone else in your life. These girls will be here in even bigger numbers in a few years. Take some time for you and get wired back together. You get older, the available girls get younger, and there are literally millions more out there willing to do their part if they are treated well.


    1. Profile gravatar of Catabisis

      Idiotocracy, You are correct. This guy needs to get his shit straight before he takes on something as complicated as these Filipinas can be. He is having problems controlling his triggers and until he fixes that he is going to be dealing with trouble all his life. He doesn’t need Filipinas complicating all that

  4. Profile gravatar of beameup

    Filipinas always “hedge their bets”… in other words, they have more than one “poriner” (foreigner) “on the line”. I’ve been in internet cafes here in the P.I. and seen (many times) girls “chatting” with as many as 9 “poriners” (foreigners) at the same time (they have webcams and 9 little windows open on their desktop). These Filipinas are very skilled at keeping track of all these “sweethearts” simultaneously… VERY skilled. And they have perfected the skill of “milking” $$$ from these “sweethearts”. As well, Filipinos reign supreme, on earth, in watching pornography, whether “online” or pirated DVDs. Often, “porn” is the main form of “family entertainment”, as there is only one TV and everyone has access to the “sala” (living room). Fucking is a national past-time in the P.I.
    “Look before you leap”.

  5. Profile gravatar of Ken

    There is a saying that we attract those who resonate with our own character. As one poster commented, get your own house in order before you look for a mate. Don’t expect your partner to heal you. That said, you cannot predict how someone will change. She has to be strong to live here in the femi-nazi US. For older guys going to the Phil: do choose a bargirl for a long term relationship! I tried to warn a friend after he went to Angeles and ‘met the girl of his dreams.’ He always tended to be impulsive and married her after knowing her for only a month! Now she’s hitting him with ’emergencies’ left and right. Cousin this, brother that. He’s so proud since she is only 28 and he is 57. He’s been snipped and can’t get her pregnant, but she claims she was anyway then miscarried. For us older men it’s easy to be gullible, and pride in a younger wife can blind us. No more than 20 year age difference is probably a good rule. There are good Phil gals in the middle class, many of whom are OFW. One thing about Filipina women (and any woman) is that you have to set to ground rules for the relationship, and never let her get away with disrespect of breaking your trust. Good luck!

  6. Profile gravatar of

    Lester, Ken has a point. You need to get your own house in order. I want a pinay wife you say. Strange thing to say. Are you shopping for a new suit or looking for a soul mate? I married a Pinay but I was never shopping for anything. I met a nice girl (I didnt care where she was from) and things moved along from there. Maybe you are looking for a mate in the wrong way and I suggest that is why you ended up disappointed. It may be your attitude.

  7. Profile gravatar of loco_loco

    Man u must forget that dumb fuck girl… One thing u understood maybe not well about Filipinos !!! The friendly and nice outside …is not their real identity. Keep these words in ur mind when u deal with them..I know it sounds fucked up from my side…but keep these words good in your mind. Ive met only one Filipina here in many years in this forsaken country, where I would have said to myself ” Wow extremely educated , absolute correct woman and very pretty” But I did never try to get with her, just because she is the wife of someone I know ,well. Do never believe you find in the Phils any better woman..this is a wrong believe from deluded guys …

  8. Profile gravatar of Esteban Magtaka III Jr
    Esteban Magtaka III Jr

    All Filipinos are “a bit short” but this one is definitely a few fries short of a happy meal…. If you wanted company, affection,empathy, and common sense ; then you should have just bought a cat….

  9. Profile gravatar of 30-30

    A cat will sleep 18 hours a day and is too lazy to hunt. Same with a lion in the bush in Africa.
    A dog however will always wag its tail when you come home, even if you are drunk, hung over and broke

  10. Profile gravatar of snakebitbytheflips

    My Dear Friend Lester,

    I can fully empathise with your situation. But please, please take my advice: GET OUT OF THAT RELATIONSHIP, and for that matter, do not even try to mess with filipinas. They have the innate ability to sense when a ‘kano is really looking for love and companionship, and they will exploit that to the max. My situation was quite different from yours in many ways, and similar in others, and I fell into that trap, losing big time in the process.

    As I write this, there is less than two hours before the drawing for a record 1.5 billion dollar Powerball Lottery jackpot. You would have a better chance of winning that money than you will in finding an intelligent filipina who would be a loving, faithful, and dedicated life partner.

    And yes, I agree about the dog. My doggie (who I rescued from a shelter) is a forever faithful friend who is always there for me.

  11. Profile gravatar of Sarah

    “I knew her for 8 months on the Website Christian Filipina before we made the trip. I deactivated my account on Christian Filipina and was totally honest.”

    And I bet she did not deactivate her account, or deactivated the one with you but created another to continue “hunting”. Did you not know? Pinays are well known for hedging their bets, just in case the “prey” escapes, then they have a “reserved”.

    Christian Filipina…. what a misnomer that name is, considering not many Filipinas & Filipinos practice real Christianity as taught in the bible. Majority are hypocrites, and only goes to church to show off a new dress, new shoes, blings, handbags, and to “spy” on who has something new (the latter typically happens in provincial churches). Besides, I am sure the male members pay, while the women join for free. Correct me if I am wrong on this.

    If I have $1 every time I hear “she’s a good Christian girl because she goes to church every Sunday”, or “they’re a nice Filipino family”, I would be rich!! Nice Filipino family who use their daughters as beasts of burden to support their lazy, parasitic asses!

  12. Profile gravatar of Angeleyes

    Lester, dump her ass and move on as she is not worth your time.
    Something I find in a lot of people (in the real world not here on this blog) is that when someone spends some time and money on something they hate to let go when all goes to shit. I have a friend here in the West who hates his girlfriend but wont leave her as they have $30,000 in savings and he is worried he will lose his $15,000 so the moron will marry her.
    So you spent ages talking to her thinking she was the one, made a trip over there that you could not afford and got kicked out of your course. Sounds like you invested a lot of time and effort for this girl and now the best thing you can do is just walk away. It is like Kenny Rogers says “You got to know when to hold em, know when to fold em” and it sounds like you got to fold em buddy. But don’t give up hope. If you really want a Filipina wife there are some good ones around, you just got to evaluate them like women in the West evaluate their potential partners and look at things like job, money, career etc. Remember there are over 50 million women over there which would put about 10 million in your range. And remember to that there is actually not as many westerners lining up to meet these women as some might think. It is actually pretty hard for a Filipina to find a Kano which makes me wonder why they try and treat us like shit but that is another story. Ask yourself; If she was a white woman from your country and was acting like this, would you continue on? I would dump her white trash ass on the spot.

  13. Profile gravatar of Catabisis

    Janice, Are you dating this guy too? I knew a woman in Mindanao who, for 1 1/2 years, Skyped with me everyday for hours. We built dreams, we laughed, planned everything out together. She said she was a province girl. She wasn’t. She said her family were tight. Stuck together like glue despite her father having an affair and fathering two children and no longer slept with her mother.
    I arrive and the old man, as cool as he was, ignored the whole family. He read all day. The mother, also retired, ate breakfast and was gone most of the day. Her sister, who I actually liked on my level, talked to my girl out of my earshot like she was an absolute piece of shit. Obviously, it was fitting. At the end of our relationship, my girl’s sister said that she thought there would be trouble from my girl after I arrived. I could go on about family, but I will leave it there.
    I met a guy in a online foreigner forum from my country who was living in the same city. I was getting pointers about the city and how the place runs. On the second day I arrived in country we met for coffee. On the third day he brought a foreigner dating his wife’s aunt. I grilled and grilled both of these guys about the city and the culture. I wanted and needed as much information as I could to survive here.
    On the third day this Filipina I came here for got pissed that I was meeting these two foreigners for coffee everyday from 8:00 AM to 10:00 AM. In so many words, I told her I was going to continue to meet them.
    Two weeks later we are walking through the mall. I am in a great mood and just enjoying my day. I have never seen a lot of Muslims and when I would see Muslim women conservatively wearing their head scarfs it gave me the impression that they were wholesome. I don’t know anything about their religion past knowing they aren’t all wearing suicide belts and not all of them hate us. When I told Janice about the way the women look wholesome in their scarfs, the first thing out of her mouth was “Maybe you should be dating Muslims girls”, in the most hateful, condescending kind of way. When I brought that up to the girl I am dating now, she asked if I would like her to wear one if I think it would make her look prettier to me.
    By the end of the month of my arrival it was over. We tried to make it work three more times. She was more erratic after each make-up until I could no longer take it and left. All she really had to offer was sex-and it was great! She had no personality past the phony façade she fronted. Clearly, she has mental health issues.
    If that wasn’t enough, she began spreading bullshit to people we know including my pinoy neighbors in order for her to cover the guilt of her shitty personality she could not control, and the reputation she actually thinks she has. I straighten that out by telling them things about her, true things, that left their jaws agape.
    I agree with what someone else said. Go to the province and find a poor, uneducated girl. Send her to college, if you want, as I did with the lady I have now. She is so grateful for hooking up with her she goes beyond what I would expect from these women post-Janice. Province girls truly are the sweetest kind you’ll find in this country. You just need to set ground rules that you will support her and no one else. If she and her family has a sense of decency you will have no problems with the issue.

  14. Profile gravatar of Lester P.
    Lester P. Post author

    I am disturbed by what I hear here. It sounds like a country built on scamming. The thing that burns me is this woman is the tightest I ever had, and I believe her when she tells me she has only had sex with 4 boyfriends. The porn thing is in the culture big time. They all just believe that white guys are huge, and hate their brown skin. The lack of empathy and descretion is too much for me. It is total disrespect. My GF Told me she doesn’t know why she loves me so much because I have small dick. I just looked at her and said, ” Maybe you don’t know what you are talking about”. But, seriously, what guy can take this sort of abuse? I know myself and have been with a lot of American women because of insecurity and I have had GF’s as well. The first girl I slept with said this same thing though and that is what caused me to just mob out and sleep around. I think that people who do this should be exposed and messed with because it causes a deep psychological insecurity to guys that is ignored by all societies. You never talk about a woman that way, but there is this double standard that is bullshit. This woman is convinced that she loves me, I can feel it, but I don’t trust a woman who watches porn all the time and laughs because one of her batchmates posts a picture in bed with another woman and he is married with children at home in Pi. The only way I would marry her, if possible for me is with a prenuptual agreement. I will make sure that my assets are secure and that if she messes around or does anything against the agreement she is sent back with nothing. Only problem is that she could just take any kids back with her. So this mess is too much. I think maybe I should stay American and keep the Fantasy Island stuff to the TV programs.

  15. Profile gravatar of Lester P.
    Lester P. Post author

    Oh, one thing. When I was in Hospital with my burns my brother found out and called me. He is retired Army over 20 years and said,
    “Lester, I tried to warn you, but if you really want a Filipina gf/wife then I have Filipino friends here and they have family over there and they can give you choices of girls that they pick out”. I told the woman this and I think she realized that she messed up big time and I don’t have to be with her. So, as you all said, this is a bad situation. I decided to not go with logic and go with love, but I had a small margin of error for my schooling and finance. Romance is great in the movies, but in real life it seems that if you don’t use your brain you fail most of the time.