State of the Internet in the Media

Even the media can not agree on the situation.

“The Philippines has an average speed of 3.5 Mbps” – Source: 2014 Net Index rankings by Internet broadband testing company Ookla
“The Philippines had an average peak internet connection speed of 32.6 megabits per second (Mbps) in the 4th quarter of 2013” Source: Akamai
WTF? Seriously, who has 32.6Mbps? And that is an average! Who even offers close to that speed who has enough subscribers to make that an average?
This report CLEARLY SHOWS the average speed is 2.1Mbps and a peak of 18.8Mbps. So where the fuck does their 32.6Mbps come from? What the holy fuckedy fuck?
It goes on to show that the Philippines has 0.3% above 10Mbps.
“In comparison, PLDT‘s up-to-100 Mbps Fibr plan costs P20,000 a month. Its lowest-end package of up-to-8 Mbps costs P3,500 per month, or costing almost twice than the Singaporean Internet service provider’s 1 Gbps plan.”
Even if you check their charts, it shows that broadband adoption of speeds above 4Mbps is almost zero, so where the hell does the “average peak internet connection speed of 32.6 megabits per second” come from? If that is the average throughput per company it is piss poor. It would be like me boasting about my HUGE COCK that was 3 inches long.
The data they state does not relate to the source they specify.
Please, if I am being a complete fucking retard just me that that straight up. If I am wrong I can learn, if I am right I cant do shit.
Published in Filipino Stupidity, Globe, PLDT


  1. Profile gravatar of L. "Dead Man Walking" K.
    L. "Dead Man Walking" K.

    PLDT is trash. I signed and bought 8 Mbps internet after asking specifically “is this plan offered in my area?” to the sales rep in their own local office. “yes po”

    The first month they installed the line and the modem, technician said the service will be available in 3 days. 7 days later nothing. Then when they do get it working 10 days after installing the line the speed never goes past 3.2 Mbps. Technician says “wait up to 3 days speed will be 8 i promise.” 20 days later speed never goes past 3.2Mbps. When i report the issue to PLDT call-center-shit-for-brains “plz come into our office po.” When i get there they cant seem to understand why my speed isn’t even half of what i’m paying for and they believe that i simply don’t know what im talking about. Then i wipe out the screenshots of my speeds throughout the day over 20 days all between 0.8 and 3.2 Mbps. I even had a few screenshots taken between 24:00 – 5:00am still the shenanigans. Then the blank blue screen stare between me and their fellow reps for another 20 minutes.

    Then i made the offer, If you cant give me what im paying for then you must downgrade my subscription plan to whats appropriate without charging me a penalty fee. They agree. When the bill comes the next month it shows a penalty fee of 12,000 php.

    Repeat all the steps above again twice until i get my way.

    “PLDT #1 (shitty) broadband internet service among dsl providers in the Philippines.”

    As of late all my good friends, colleagues and myself, that have PLDT at their homes here have experiencing “dead page loading” where the moment you enter a URL or send a browse request the page 404’s immediately without even trying to connect to the destination. It takes multiple attempts to international websites for the request to go through. It’s good to know that PLDT reps saying “its only you” is more stupidity on their end than me being crazy.

    1. Profile gravatar of TheD
      TheD Post author

      They’re all sadly just as bad as the last one.
      PLDT screwed up so many times (I will write a post about that) so I moved to Globe, who were so incompetent that they actually committed fraud against me. Next SkyCable who for the past 46 days have been picking their ass. Our install date was 46 days ago.

      Here is the issue my friend. Technology is intelligent and logical. How can you every expect a company who is not intelligent or logical to ever manage a service of that nature?

      One HUGE thing is their DNS which fail all day every day. I switched to Google DNS and it worked like a charm. Never had any issues, unless there was one on the line.

      I had to tell their engineers what the issue is and how to fix it.

      They would turn up and say “it is the modem sir” to which I would reply “please show me the logical steps you took to end up at this conclusion” Blank stare. I event had my assistant translate it fully and his LOGICAL REASONING WAS: because its the modem. Really? Then prove it.

      Nasty bastard me, I knew it wasnt the modem as I had already tested it by swapping it for my backup modem, I just wanted to see what had led him to think that. That was how I always trained my staff when they were wrong. I didnt just want to say “youre wrong” I wanted them to understand the logical steps and progression that led them to the incorrect answer. It is not as simple as knowing the right answer, you need to understand why you were wrong so you can correct it.

      The term “headless chickens” springs to mind. Just running around and getting nowhere.

      The funniest one for me is when they told me to unplug the splitter. “I am using the phone in the house” I told her. “opo sir” she replied “I just need you to unplug the splitter”. I had to explain to her that doing so would disconnect the call.

      Look at how they describe their products “Fiber fast” Really? If that were in any other country they would be made accountable through such laws as (in the uk) “The Trade Descriptions Act 1968 is an Act of the Parliament of the United Kingdom which prevents manufacturers, retailers or service industry providers from misleading consumers as to what they are spending their money on. This law empowers the judiciary to punish companies or individuals who make false claims about the products or services that they sell.”

      But remember, this is a country where companies blatantly abuse copyright. How many busses have you seen with Disney characters on them?
      For that matter why do taxis and jeepneys put stickers on their windows and paintwork to make it look like someone has been shooting at them? WTF is that about?

    2. Profile gravatar of TheD
      TheD Post author

      Also, have you got a refund from PLDT for issues?
      It takes SIX MONTHS OR MORE! One month for them to process it and FIVE FUCKING MONTHS to get it signed. Is there a shortage of pens? What the fuck is happening?

        1. Profile gravatar of TheD
          TheD Post author

          ARE YOU INSANE? “They give you credit on your next bill”. Did they do that to you? We waited 6 months for the credit to be applied.

  2. Profile gravatar of jose

    The speed reported must be from the proxy servers (sky broadband in my case) connection. That’s the only explanation I can think of.

    1. Profile gravatar of Fr. Bong Bong Jolog Jun III
      Fr. Bong Bong Jolog Jun III

      I have an explanation. It’s simply that they made that shit up. We are talking about companies that routinely defraud their millions of users, every day. Do you think for one moment that they would hesitate to publish something which was pure fabrication? Blatant, unadulterated bullshit.

      1. Profile gravatar of TheD
        TheD Post author

        I thought about that too, but it is provided by international speed testers.
        There simply must be one dude downloading all those dvds you see on the streets at an astounding rate.

    2. Profile gravatar of TheD
      TheD Post author

      I thought of that too, but that would mean that at peak hours the entire philippines is only using 30+MB per second. It cant be.
      A single business office would have a greater output such as a call center.

      You’re with sky broadband? I just told them to shove it after they fiddled with themselves for 46 days trying to provide an install date. Solution: cracked globe box with limiter removed 😉

      And for that matter, I hit 16Mbps so again the 30+Mbps they state is a fucking fabrication unless they are adding up servers and other large connections.