The Philippines is a Narcissistic Society


Narcissism is a pattern of thinking and behaving in adolescence and adulthood, which involves infatuation and obsession with one’s self to the exclusion of others. It manifests in the chronic pursuit of personal gratification and attention (narcissistic supply), in social dominance and personal ambition, bragging, insensitivity to others, lack of empathy and/or excessive dependence on others to meet his/her responsibilities in daily living and thinking.

Five (or more) of these criteria must be met for a diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder:

·         Feels grandiose and self-important (e.g., exaggerates accomplishments, talents, skills, contacts, and personality traits to the point of lying, demands to be recognised as superior without commensurate achievements);

·         Firmly convinced that he or she is unique and special;

·         Requires excessive admiration, adulation, attention and affirmation – or, failing that, wishes to be feared and to be notorious (Narcissistic Supply);

·         Feels entitled. Demands automatic and full compliance with his or her unreasonable expectations for special and favourable priority treatment;

·         Is “interpersonally exploitative”, i.e., uses others to achieve his or her own ends;

·         Devoid of empathy. Is unable or unwilling to identify with, acknowledge, or accept the feelings, needs, preferences, priorities, and choices of others;

·         Constantly envious of others and seeks to hurt or destroy the objects of his or her frustration.

·         Behaves arrogantly and haughtily. Feels superior, omnipotent, omniscient, invincible, immune, “above the law“, and omnipresent (magical thinking). Rages when frustrated, contradicted, or confronted by people he or she considers inferior to him or her and unworthy.

The narcissist’s relationships are self-serving and, therefore shallow and superficial. They are centred around and geared at the regulation of his self-esteem (obtaining narcissistic supply for the regulation of his labile sense of self-worth.)

The narcissist is not “genuinely” interested in his intimate partner’s experiences (implying that he does fake such interest convincingly.) The narcissist emphasizes his need for personal gain (by using the word “need”, the DSM V acknowledges the compulsive and addictive nature of narcissistic supply). These twin fixtures of the narcissist’s relationships render them one-sided: no mutuality or reciprocity (no intimacy).

The Narcissist fails to regard other people, situations, or entities (political parties, countries, races, his workplace) as a compound of good and bad elements. He either idealises his object – or devalues it. The object is either all good or all bad. The bad attributes are always projected, displaced, or otherwise externalised. The good ones are internalised in order to support the inflated (grandiose) self-concepts of the narcissist and his grandiose fantasies – and to avoid the pain of deflation and disillusionment.

Research shows that most narcissists are born into dysfunctional families. Such families are characterised by massive denials, both internal (“you do not have a real problem, you are only pretending”) and external (“you must never tell the secrets of the family to anyone”). Abuse in all forms is not uncommon in such families. These families may encourage excellence, but only as means to a narcissistic end. The parents are usually themselves needy, emotionally immature, and narcissistic and thus unable to recognize or respect the child’s emerging boundaries and emotional needs.


Narcissistic rage

Any challenge, mildly negative remark, or disagreement from another person is considered criticism, rejection and even mockery. They take these personally as an assault or betrayal and lash out at the person who provoked them. Narcissistic rage often results in physical and/or emotional abuse.

Raging narcissists usually perceive their reaction to have been triggered by an intentional provocation with a hostile purpose. Their targets, on the other hand, invariably regard raging narcissists as incoherent, unjust, and arbitrary.

Narcissistic rage should not be confused with anger, though they have many things in common.


1. Challenge to their Confidence:  People with narcissism often place unrealistic demands on their partner or children. These demands are frequently challenged by the person in the relationship. When challenged, the narcissists’ brittle egos are unable to accept the idea that they were wrong or seen as imperfect. They turn this into a personal attack and respond with rage toward that person to regain their sense of superiority.

2. Injury to Self-Esteem:  When a narcissist’s shortcomings are pointed out by someone, they feel an overwhelming sense of shame. The narcissist then lashes out toward the person who pointed out the shortcomings. The rage is executed to seek revenge upon the accuser. The need for revenge results in explosive rage and does not die down until the narcissist feels the person was dealt appropriate punishment.

3. False Sense of Self:  The narcissist has a false sense of self. Underlying this false sense of self are feelings that he is not loveable for who he is or what he offers in relationships. When a lover or partner begins to feel doubts about the narcissist, that is when the narcissistic rage surfaces.


Narcissism:  IT’S THE CULTURE.

Published in Delusional Filipino


  1. Profile gravatar of Sarah

    A very excellent article Bevis! Although I would probably categorized the Filipinos as ” Dependent Personality Disorder” with Narcissistic tendencies. Both diagnosis can exist on the one person.

    According to the American Psychiatric Association (APA), Dependent Personality Disorder refers to a pervasive and excessive need to be taken care of, which leads to submissive and clinging behavior.Of course, the Filipinos takes this to a higher level by throwing tampos in the midst, rather than just being clingy. I would say that “tampo” is the equivalent of “passive-aggressive” behaviours in Psych. speak. Or to put it bluntly….sulk!

    In the Pinoy world, nothing gets everyone’s attention quickly than tampo, wherein everyone in the family would do anything to pacify the person doing the “tampo”. If practiced early enough in childhood and unrestrained by discipline, here we see the development of a Personality Disordered Child, of which can turn said child into an adult monster. That is, psychopaths, sociopaths, or plain anti-social personality disorder who has no regard for the law, and no respect for anything and anyone.

    Now, the bad news…A study in 2012 found that two-thirds of this disorder stemmed from genetics while one-third came from the environment, is more prevalent in females, (if she’s Filipina, magnify the risks by 25%!).

    Dependent Personality Disorder is characterized by at least 3 of the following:

    1. encouraging or allowing others to make most of one’s important life decisions;
    2. feeling uncomfortable or helpless when alone, because of exaggerated fears of inability to care for oneself;

    3.preoccupation with fears of being abandoned by a person with whom one has a close relationship, and of being left to care for oneself. capacity to make everyday decisions

    Although there are sub-types of Dependent Personality Disorder, I think I would classify the Filipinos as Ineffectual subtype. Here are the characteristics of a Dependent Personality Disorder, Ineffectual subtype:

    Unproductive, gainless, incompetent, useless, meritless; seeks untroubled life; refuses to deal with difficulties; untroubled by shortcomings. Human behaviour is really an interesting study.

  2. Profile gravatar of FHPS

    Filipino’s are ok in day to day life when you are at “arms length”
    when they (both male and female) break into your “personal space bubble” so to speak thats when they become different.

    What I find annoying is the overused expression “not all filipina are like that”. Well.. ok, MOST not all. Whether it be Luzon, Mindanao, Visayas filipinos all exhibit the same inherent way of acting.

    When they want something – theres always load on the phone, they are on time (even early!! :)), they return calls and they are so kind and attentive.

    When YOU want something they never answer the phone, arent reachable, unreliable (turning up next day even for scheduled appointments) and basically don’t give a shit about the you in return.

    Have you ever been sick? try that… have you noticed how many people you may have helped filipino and do they even ask “how are you feeling”?

    When theres no more money in the honey pot to give out – are the filipinos around? no .. no offers of help or pay back?

    The focus is all about themselves first.
    Wheres my gift and all the other sayings coupled with huge dollops of jealousy.

    The sad reality is casual visitors to the Philippines and people that have never lived here only see one side. They have never experienced going through the daily motions associated with life here from their hotel rooms. Some bloggers even dish out propoganda how good Boracay and Palawan was and how nice the filipinos are. Filipinos are self serving, they are only nice when they want something. Its not until you have lived here some time that you start seeing all of this self serving behaviour coming out. One needs to go through the motions to find out, some relationships, some situations etc before the penny drops.

  3. Profile gravatar of FHPS

    * Ive told my friends .. check this out. We have had conversations by text and said “say your sad, say your stressed” etc. and cannot meet this week. Ok, the replies from the filipina were as expected. Self absorbed and no regard for the other persons feelings.

    The reply comments were “so you dont like me” so you dont want to meet now, why? why dont you want to meet me. Can we meet now (even after saying didnt feel up to going out). As you can see, many girls in the Philippines reply in this manner and totally ignore how you are feeling. It’s a me, me me attitude and its quite a common pattern throughout the country. The attitude of you have something, I want it. If i don’t get it, ill be dissapointed.

    I’ve had girls just turn up at all hours of the day and night even after I stated IM WORKING. it won’t register. They are so hell bent on themselves they cannot relate or empathasise.

    1. Profile gravatar of kalbo

      That’s a great post! Im really learning a lot of things coming to this website. Stuff that was always in the back of my mind but I couldnt quite distil into a few sentences.

      That’s right – It’s all about them! and fuck how you feel or what you think. That just doesnt matter.

      This reminds me of a situation I was in a few years ago.

      I had zero energy and pains everywhere. Went to the docs. He ordered a battery of blood tests. I had a wait a week to go to the hospital for that. Then wait another week for results. One more to go back to docs, no positives, so he ordered more tests. So had few more weeks of tests and waiting for results to come back.

      All this time, my ex flip gf was being abusive demanding that I fly to the PI to see her. I explain about the waiting times for appointments and processing etc.

      BUT that was immediately ignored as if nothing has happened as if im just fine. She didnt even ask how I was!

  4. Profile gravatar of FHPS

    Its true anyway that filipinos are narcissists
    a recent survey conducted by global market research company, Synovate Inc. revealed that 48 percent of Filipino males felt they were sexually attractive. Jesus, i don’t know how they can say they are sexually attractive when to me .. they all have black hair, similar skin colour, speak with similar accents, eat the same food, pray to the same god and talk about the same shit. How do they make themselves appear sexually more appealing than the other pinoy guy?

    his revelation made another global media outlet, CNN International conclude that Filipino men are the most narcissistic in Asia.

    1. Profile gravatar of Beavis
      Beavis Post author

      Interesting, I never gave it much thought. But, then that brings to mind that if that their attractiveness were so true, then why does it seem that the majority of actors/actresses/singers are only half Filipino?

      1. Profile gravatar of FHPS

        yep. Filipino media is focused on WHITE SKIN, half. Its like they get off on it and reflective of that “ive made it fuckers” attitude they have (and forget from the shit pit they came from) instead of being modest.

        You never see many filipino looks and colours that you normally see out in the streets on TV. Its half castes.

        Look at all the advertising for whitening products. Its just a mind fuck for them and thats why they will stop at nothing to get some status.

    2. Profile gravatar of Sarah

      Not just Filipino men, Filipinas also. If you mingle with the lot of them and can actually understand the language, you would be so shocked of their narcissism. It’s all about me, myself, and I.

      And there’s a lot of delusions there too, a lot of pretentiousness and delusions of grandeur. A lot of Filipinas I’ve met anywhere always try and build themselves up as someone else they’re not. A good example is when they ride on the glory of the family name from a long time ago. A good example was Imelda Romualdez Marcos. When she was First Lady, the Filipino media, and doubtless her PR staff would never mention of her poverty stricken background, of how they lived on a rich relative’s garage.

      For us Aussies, another example was Rose Lacson Hancock Porteus. Now, who have not heard of this notorious Filipina? In her book titled “A Rose by any other name”, Rose was careful to highlight her links to the influential Chinese – Filipino family name, Lacson, while carefully avoided mentioning that she was once married to a Filipino. However, when some of her family members were interviewed, they pointed out that the Family glory was gone a long time ago during the Spanish years.

        1. Profile gravatar of Sarah

          Don’t know how I missed that video? But a good one of Rose Hancock Porteous… a classic example of Histrionic Personality Disorder with Narcissistic traits thrown in.

          She’s also proof that one can not make a silk purse from a sow’s ear. She’s had so much plastic surgery, her belly button’s up to her chin! One more facelift and that bellybutton would have come in full circle!

  5. Profile gravatar of Sarah

    “When theres no more money in the honey pot to give out – are the filipinos around? no .. no offers of help or pay back?”

    This is so true!!

    I have an Aunt who was married to a European guy in the 90s. He was sending P50,000 a month then. A lot of money then, and even now especially as she did not have to pay any mortgage and was living in the provinces.

    The money would arrive towards the end of the month….and the low-life freeloading Pinoys in town would flock to her house once they can smell money. Auntie was of generous soul, albeit gullible. So no one left empty handed. Fast forward 20 years later and Auntie was divorced, unemployed and destitute. She’s been plagued with illnesses in the last few years, forcing her to sell the house in the province, the house that the Kano built so she can support herself. Do you think any of those free-loading Pinoys came to pay her back, or helped her when she was sick? NOT ONE! I told her she should collect all those money she’s loaned to those people years ago. But she would not, stating “oh, that was a long time ago. They’ve probably forgotten that they owed me money”. Yes, very conveniently forgotten.

    1. Profile gravatar of Gerd

      Hi everyone, I read your posts and it really seems to me that the bad Filipino habit (I quote Sarah)“When theres no more money in the honey pot to give out – are the filipinos around? no .. no offers of help or pay back?” has also spread to some Europeans, together with the following Filipinos bad habits:

      1) disastrous overbreeding
      2) “Help me, help me” + sob story
      3)if YOU need help for some reason, “well, it’s your problem”
      4) incapacity of managing money correctly
      5) coming from a poor background and if they put some money away, giving him/herself the airs of a king/queen
      6) living on their family charity
      7) once you can’t give money or do favours for them, they stab you in the back, spreading malicious rumors.
      8) irresponsible behaviour with pets

      Example #1:

      A close relative of mine (I’ll call her Vicky here) comes from a poor background. Her family was such in a bad financial situation that if my mom wouldn’t have bought groceries for them, Vicky would have starved; if my mom wouldn’t have paid Vicky’s rent for kindergarten, Vicky would have remained in that hovel that she called home (she grew up in the European equivalent of the South Bronx; my mom “pulled some strings” so the local council finally gave Vicky’s family somewhere more decent to live; hadn’t my mom bought her presents for Xmas, she would have found nothing under the Xmas tree…According to her family, “holiday” meant “visiting cuz Gerd at her seaside home”…these visits were the only holidays they knew for years. I think you got the picture). Well, luckily Vicky’s parents both worked (a low-paying job, but they worked), they had the sense to think that “education is our top priority for our daughter”, so Vicky finished high school, got a job a later married a decent guy. Vicky’s husband family bought them a house with 3 bathrooms, 3 bedrooms, a garden, etc and now Vicky put on the airs of a queen. When I was in dire straits because of an abusive relationship (thank God I managed to walk out from it and thank God I had some savings apart, because to quit my ex, I also needed to quit my job, the city where I was living in, etc, because, according to what the cops said “I was at serious risk”, so they advised me to move “almost six hours of driving away from your abusive partner”), I came back to my home city and Vicky invited me to her place just to brag about her house, children, husband, berating and belittling me in every possible way. (Well, just to let you know, when my former partner once called me every name under the sun in front of her, swearing like a trooper, she didn’t move an eyelash ). Afterwards, I moved abroad (“wise move”, according to the cops) and I was lucky enough to land a job in a field I know and I like (in TV productions). Well, things seem to go well…One day, Vicky writes me on Facebook and says that “one of her friends needs help for her college thesis about the media industry”. I replied “Well, Vicky, tell your friend to put her B-side on a plane and then we can talk” and then Vicky put on a sourpuss (do you call it a “tampo” in this blog :)? Then, she insulted and me for everything I wrote on FB, every occasion was good to throw a virtual fight, so I blocked her (and also my mom was shocked when she saw what she wrote). Well, I came to know that she was pregnant again and I wrote “Does it seem that I care?” on FB so our friends in common clearly saw what I thought of her. The baby arrives and it’s the dead of the European winter.
      My mom calls, she says “Vicky’s baby is sick, he needs a warmer, drier climate, Vicky asked me if she can spend a little holiday with you, so you meet also her new baby…” I replied “Mom, tell Vicky “Big, huge, fat HELL NO. Next time, she learns not to treat me like trash. Does she brag her hubby is rich? Fine, let HIS family provide the holiday in the “hotter, drier climate” for the brat.”

      1. Profile gravatar of Gerd

        Example #2:

        There was a colleague of mine, I’ll call her Eliza here…Well, Eliza worked with my productions quite often and saw that my situation with my ex partner wasn’t good at all. He treated me like trash also in front of her and I reacted. Eliza said “Gerd, you are too impulsive, you should enrol in a yoga or meditation class” (well, I think every reader of this blog would have gone BALLISTIC for MUCH less…Eliza showed me the first clue of Filipino attitude in an European body).

        Then, she lived in a 70 square meters apartment with her partner and 3 kids and she adopts a dog. Ok, that’s nice from her to adopt a puppy, but the problem is that she and hubby worked all day and “the children couldn’t walk the dog, it was a big dog”. The aforementioned dog was a hunting dog…I don’t think it makes sense to adopt such a big dog that needs space and movement, if you live in such a small, crowded apartment. And the eldest kid is 13, she can take the dog out for a walk after school, she’s not invalid. On the contrary, she was quite plump, so a bit of walking would have done her a world of good. Once the situation between me and my ex was so bad that “in a murky and cold winter night” (an European winter…), I packed up all my stuff and left. While I was driving, she called me sobbing that his youngest child had a earache, what I could advise her, and things. I replied “Eliza, this time I can’t help you, you have to help me.” I just asked her if she knew a hotel (I didn’t even asked her to take me in!) and she threw a major attitude calling me a selfish b*tch, I didn’t care about a poor, sick kid, etc (well, ehm, and who cared about me when I was in dire straits? A big, huge, fat nobody).

        Well, after a while Eliza says that she lost her job due to downsizing (as far as I knew the boss there, he replaced her with somebody else he knew…a bit like the “compadre” system in the Philippines) so she and her partner decided to move abroad. Ok that they moved to her hubby’s original nation and she spoke the language, but she never even visited the place and she made a total mess while preparing the moving (some things they sent never arrived, she didn’t know that the kids also needed passports so they missed their flight…Filipino-like organization, I think).

        Things seem to go well, she posted on FB pictures of food, drinks, sunset on the beach, etc (like many Filipinos do at Starbucks and Boracay, it seems to me I read here); whenever she contacted me, Eliza bragged how she hit the jackpot and whenever I needed someone to talk to, due to my divorce, it seemed that she always had sthg else to do “right this minute”. Well, I also move abroad and Eliza seems eager to talk to me, to know what I do, and bla bla bla.
        I tell her that yes, I work, and Eliza wants to know how big is my apartment, how much I earn, if it’s difficult to move to the nation I live now (this reminds me quite much of the Filipinos I read here about). Well, I answer to all that questions, “smelling a rat” already. When I “digged” in Eliza’s thoughts a bit more, I found out:

        1) she was in some sort of financial mess about which she never wanted to share the exact details with me (like many Filipinos do when they mess things up and expect white people to help them…). All her family ended up completely broke and Eliza’s family had to ask money all around the neighbourhood to buy the whole brood the airplane tickets back to Europe.

        2) She wasn’t sure of her partner anymore

        3) She adopted other 6 dogs and she was “brokenhearted” at the thought of abandoning them (I think that she should think twice before adopting every stray dog she sees…dogs also cost money for food, vet expenses, sterilization, etc)

        4) Cherry on the cake, she was pregnant again with her fourth kid (irresponsible Filipino-style breeding)

        Eliza asked me if she could move with all her brood to the country where I lived, if I could sponsor her to get a job for her and her husband, to take her and her family in, “we’ll sleep on the floor” (I think this blog readers heard this sentence, already, quite many times…), I’m ready to do everything, even washing dishes in restaurants and pick fruis…”. I explained her that her idea was completely impossible, as here the “sponsorship system” doesn’t work, and to move here legally, either you are the registred partner of a citizen of this state, either your family was originally from here (sthg like the “ius sanguinis”…). And guess what she said? “Ok, then I’ll meet some guy on the Internet and tell officials he’s my bf”. I replied “Officials will check you and your potential partner exactly like in the movie “Green Card” and if you lie, either they deport you, either you’ll rot in jail here. And who will take care of your kids you, Santa Claus?”.
        And I added “If, let’s imagine, you manage to arrive here and you scrub floors and your husband washes dishes in a restaurant, you won’t be able to support 4 kids decently…what will you do, live on charity or do you think I take you in and live like a 70s style commune? Poor kids, moved here and there like packs…it’s not good for their emotional stability, as well”.
        Again, this idea seemed me quite Filipino-style…swindling the law and building up impossible, unrealistic scenarios and thinking that just because you live abroad, you found some kind of Eldorado.

      2. Profile gravatar of Gerd

        Example #3:

        My ex partner had a 20sthg daughter, I’ll call her Cathy here.

        Cathy didn’t even finish high school, if she landed some kind of odd job always thanks to the “compadre” system, she came to work one day yes and 3 days no, because she was often getting over her previous night hangovers (reminds me of many Filipinos after too much Red Horse, rum, of whatever they drink and she considered these jobs “temporary”, because she seemed to like music “too much”…many musicians, before becoming stars, also worked normally and tried to do their best), and she always went around asking everyone she knew “Can I borrow 10 euros, can I borrow this and that…” no need to say that “Can I borrow?” meant “give me this and that” (and be sure you never saw your money or things again because “she was distract, she didn’t know where she left it”, poor thing…).
        As no one wanted to hire her anymore because of her attitude (even if you have an odd job, as long it’s honest and decent, respect it, it’s always a job and a source of income), of course she couldn’t afford to rent a place of her own anywhere, so of course she lived with her mommy. At home, Cathy didn’t lift a finger to clean up her room, or cook, she sat on her PC or with her lazybum friends all day.

        Well, I told her many times that many famous singers were discovered singing or playing in piano bars, marriages and pubs; she did so for a while, then she quit because it was “too tiring, as she had to stay up all day/ all night” (Well, also Justin Bieber, Lady Gaga, Madonna or some other singer or performer is quite busy, when he/she is on a tour…) and if you really want to do sthg in the entertainment business, you have to work hard on many things; your performances, your voice, your way of playing, your contacts…You don’t become somebody by just sitting at home, waiting that sthg arrives from the sky…
        And it happened quite often that “she quarreled” with Mom, so my partner “invited” her to our place for a meal…and, like many Filipinos, she didn’t like this, she didn’t like that…I would have understood if she was used to eat in the finest restaurant, but all she swallowed were: pizza, French fries, Haribo gummy bears and booze (and then she complained about her gastritis all the time…a bit like many Filipinos, that they eat a lot of junk food and then complain about their poor health).

        Once my ex and me went on holiday and he “installed” Cathy in our apartment so “she could take care of it, so thieves won’t come in”. You can imagine that the apartment looked like a Navy Seals training camp after that week and Cathy didn’t even lift a finger to clean up the mess (and her dad defended her…). Once we were moving house, and Cathy started her whining “Can I borrow, can I borrow, can I borrow” (in the middle of a moving, so imagine…) I said: “Cathy, you want money? Work it off” and I offered the same amount of money a professional mover would get; and she curled her nose and said “Too tiring”. My relationship with my ex also ended because his attitude towards his irresponsible daughter, so I can understand why so many Western men have such a lot of problems with Filipino families…

    2. Profile gravatar of Pinay Lover
      Pinay Lover

      Gerd, You’ll find Filipino’s follow the same money moron mistakes over and over again and will never learn from them. Instead of learning that spending money they don’t have is bad and getting into debt will ruin credit and destroy their future, they prefer to put their head in the sand and act like they can have it all because hey, “we’re Pinoy and we’re proud”.

      You’ll see them fuck themselves over countless time’s through their vicious cycles of “pride” and being on their FAKE pedestal just to be “better”, when all they while they are just mere posers, without a dime and no REAL prospects. But don’t ever question their pride and point out to them that they are making a big mistake, because the moment you do that they will viciously attack you and defend their stupidity to the bitter end. The best you can do is let them sink in their self created quick sand and then laugh when they suddenly need your help! “help, I’m a fuck up who doesn’t take any advice and I got myself into this mess, now you have to bail me out!”

      They are all about having others bail them out for being stupid. It’s another part of their “culture” where bailing out dumbfuckery is a “tradition”. They love to just make cultures and traditions up as they go. You’ll hear a new one every fucking day.

      They are the dumbest shit for brains people when it comes to money. Trust me, I’ve only seen maybe 1 out of 10 that are decent with money and life decisions, while the rest are just living a fallacy, pretending like they have it all when really they don’t have a dime!

      1. Profile gravatar of Beavis
        Beavis Post author

        My impression has always been that since they didn’t work for it, it’s very easy to waste. I would hope that if they actually put in the time and effort to earn what they got, then it wouldn’t be so easily frittered away.

        For example, if they saved for two years to start their own sari sari store, then they would likely make damn sure that it works out.

        But if a foreigner simply harvests cash from his secret money tree hidden in his backyard and buys a sari sari store as a gift, then what difference does it make? Just accept the gift and it it doesn’t work, then tough fucking shit. More where that came from.

        Bottom line: people do not value what they did not earn.

      2. Profile gravatar of Sarah

        (I quote Sarah)“When theres no more money in the honey pot to give out – are the filipinos around? no .. no offers of help or pay back?”

        Gerd, first off I did not made that qoute. It was someone else who said that and I replied to it. For some reason you are the 2nd person who has quoted me wrongly.

        Second, of course every society, culture, race has their own groups of misfits. The psychiatric ward of the hospital I work for here in Australia are full of druggies, alcoholics, misfits, anti-social personality disorders, dependent personality disorders, borderline personality disorders, people who can’t cope with the world, then blames anyone and everyone else for their problems. Sounds like Filipinos, aren’t they?

        And oh, many don’t work and has not put in a day’s work all their lives, but because of our generous social welfare system and stupid doctors (many are foreign trained!), they are collecting disability pensions because our Doctors give them medical certificates so easy!

        If you think druggies grow old and give up their habits – Think again! I’ve got patients who are in their 60s still smoking Marijuana and no plans to give up. Guess who’s picking the tab for their health care?

        I am sure there you will find similar people in your country if you check out your country’s psychiatric wards, the prison system and homeless shelters.

        Thankfully, these parasites of society are a minority and a burden to our governments, not to their immediate families. This financial year, I have paid enough tax to support two of these parasites for a year.

        BUT we are talking of a western society here. Next of kins, parents, siblings has the choice to say “fuck you, you’re on your own!” and many have! Well, at least here in Australia families don’t put up very long with behaviors like these and they eventually disown them.

        Not so in the Philippines because the little Filipinos/Filipinas get so brain washed during their developing years that they owed their parents their lives for bringing them into this world! How fuck up is that? So your mum and dad had fun while they were making you, then charges you for it for the rest of your life?? Only in da Failippines!!

        1. Profile gravatar of


          Is it just me or are you trying to compare marijuana smokers to heroin addicts?I know its not your point but in my country there is a way of saying ”Everything is for the people just with the limitation”. You can very easy also mention the alcoholics.

          About the taxes; try to get the flips to Denmark where the lowest tax is 38% and where you get money just by playing mental sick. The medical care is free and also the education. The country will became a 3rd world country within a year.

    3. Profile gravatar of Gerd

      Dear Sarah,
      when you wrote”When there’s no more money in the honey pot…” and then “So true”, I wanted to say, by repeating this sentence, that I agreed with you. And when I discovered this blog and the wrong behaviour of some Europeans, I thought “Uhm, how can people everywhere ruin their lives in that way?”

      1. Profile gravatar of Gerd

        and I also wanted to add that I wrote the examples of “Filipinos born into European bodies” basing myself on the article that appeared on this blog some time ago, whose title was “Filipinos born into American bodies”, telling the story of a guy called “John”

  6. Profile gravatar of FHPS

    If you want racism .. look at all the advertising and the actors? Its not reflective of the rest of the countries look is it Beavis.

    1. Profile gravatar of FHPS

      Rose, dear Rose
      This is how filipinos get. She is a maid from Negros, married a rich guy
      She soons loses that “negros personality” and develops a
      “im rich, i made it fuckers” personality.
      They have such short memories.

      Sarah – June 19th, 2015 at 10:36 am none Comment author #9486 on The Philippines is a Narcissistic Society by Philippines Fail Blog
      “When theres no more money in the honey pot to give out – are the filipinos around? no .. no offers of help or pay back?”

      Yes, have you been sick? Did any filipinos come and offer to help? all that they say is “arr ok” and “sorry to hear that get well soon” after all the help I gave.
      THEN GONE! the excuse .. i wanted to give you space and lots of other BS

      wHAT It is is
      they are worried i will TAKE SOMETHING FROM THEM
      they have been fucked over all their life
      for money, time, etc that they hear i am sick … they are worried to commit an ounce of time and might think i might bludge on them for medicine, rent etc as im sick and not working.. who the fuck knows. all i know is they stink when it comes to paying back favours.

      My friends say same and theres people overseas my friend didnt see for 10-15 years and they were on to him DAILY saying how are you.. wish could help,,, at least some genuine, authentic care and concern!!!

  7. Profile gravatar of Sarah

    “My impression has always been that since they didn’t work for it, it’s very easy to waste.”

    I have noticed that too Beavis. Over the years, I have given several cousins, Aunties, nephews, etc electronic goods, jewelries, cell phones, tablets, cameras etc etc. None lasted! I gave a cousin a brand new cell phone. I told him if he can take care of it and make it last, I might give him a laptop. The phone did not even see 12 months. I gave an Aunt my good as new Nokia phone which was in my possession for 10 years, but not even a scratch on it. A year later the keys were sticky and the charging port was loose. Another Aunt received my 10 month old as new Blackberry phone. Three months later I asked “where’s the phone I gave you?”. “oh, it stopped working” – she said. Then the camera, 6 months in her hand and the shutters won’t shut. Jewelries…. “where’s the watch I gave you?” I asked. “It got stolen”. The bakla cousin was the beneficiary of my old tablet last year. Early this year he complained that it’s not charging.

    What’s wrong with these people that they can’t take care of anything? Is it the easy come, easy go attitude? Are their hands so slipper from the humidity that they drop things so easily?

    One thing for sure: none of my Filipino relatives will ever receive anything from me ever!

    1. Profile gravatar of FHPS

      Why is that? why the fuck does everything stop working Sarah
      you raised a good point
      ive had mine with the screen stopped

      One filipina wanted to come to me
      NO MONEY
      i said ok .. forget it
      you know this stupid girl got in a taxi and i said i have no cash i had problems getting out of the ATM which was true!!
      i had 400 pesos to my name and i said i need food money until the ATM is resolved, please FUCK OFF. STAY AWAY.

      No no .. she wanted to see me
      so she tries to pawn my GIFT phone (YEP THE GIFT I GAVE HER -albeit its a SSK 400p phone lol) to the taxi driver as a fare —bzzzzz … taxi driver doesnt want it
      when she got in the car .. her cousin came in and then borrowed 200p off the driver
      to buy “medicine” (dont you love that word — medicine … they love medicine in the Philippines)

      so she arrives and maybe i should have said .. taxi driver not my problem
      but then he started making a scene and wanting to call the cops
      so the 200borrow (yea wtf) + fare
      i just had enough
      *thats the story of the cell phone i gave and this stupid girl wanted to pawn it to a taxi driver in lieu of paying a taxi fare but wanted to do it AT THE END

  8. Profile gravatar of FHPS

    heres the scam. THIS IS REAL.

    foreigner has to go home to Japan for long term.
    his filipina wants to study and so she says can you pay my terms
    he pays two terms
    he buys a laptop (oh! DONT they all wanna work online and make money from home)

    whats she do
    she cancels the second semester (to get a refund – which has college penalties out of it) —-but she doesnt give a shit its not her money

    she pawns the pc and then gets the money – she gets next to nothing in the pawnshop for a pc —- but she doesnt give a shit its not her money

    She then has cash.
    She takes photos of the cash and posts on her facebook friends
    with a big grin… LOOK AT ME… LOOK AT ME…

    oh its lost …shit …
    can you buy another cell phone mr foreigner
    ok, … cell phone given as most foreigners are stupid to buy shit for these leaches
    surprise surprise cell phone found
    sell unopened cell phone or take unopened cell phone box to pawnshop
    cash in hand

    One guy from the US actually went through with getting one of these filipina leaches to the US
    she ran around down to Gen San and he went their and she said its unsafe go home to visayas
    she never introduced hiim to family (which i wonder if she was married or bf here)
    he bought her ipads, cell phones etc
    she came, took the lot and dissapeared
    by that time the yank had had a visa in place
    he proposed to her after a month of meeting her!!! (the record i heard is 8 days for a guy to propose marriage upon meeting and taking back to the US after the visa was approved)
    Anyway the girl in the first story appeared again
    and he still went through with getting her to the US

  9. Profile gravatar of Sarah

    They really are a master at obtaining money by easy means!

    foreignerhardpinoysoft, you will love this one:

    Also in Davao. A Kano had a Pinay mistress, who he thought was 100% single – NOT! Old Kano put Pinay in a rented apartment, bought her expensive jewels and even a red SUV, plus money, lots and lots of it! Well, the mistress being the typical Pinay, have money will gloat and started putting on airs and graces. Soon enough, the green monster reared its ugly head, and the jealous Pinays told the Kano that his beloved was really a married mother of two!

    Old Kano hired a PI, got the proof and invited the Pinay for a fancy dinner at the condo he was paying for. Then confronted her with the evidence. She tried to deny it, he beat the crap out of her, then kicked her ass out of the condo and asked for the jewels back. “jewels are gone”, she said. Next day, she went to the Police station to charge the Kano for beating her up. The Kano counter charged with thief, alleging that the jewels were only loaned to her, not given. Guess what? He got off! A rarity in the Failippines!

    1. Profile gravatar of FHPS

      Well, that was a good story Sarah and thats like a filipino guy that scammed his way out of the jewels of my friends now ex. he said i was in on a porn ring with him (bullshit) and give me the rings and ill go and return them to him. (my friend) — he pawned them. this FILAM also got 8k (total 20k) out of the aunts and neighbours for fake visa applications to work in canada!.

      And thats a rarity by the sound of it that the cops sided with the kano ..
      she would have pawned the goods
      they pawn anything valuable …

    2. Profile gravatar of Beavis
      Beavis Post author

      That’s still not justice. Yes, it is bad that he beat her, but you know what? If I knew I could get a free car out of the deal, for example, I would gladly get beaten up for the trade.

      Betcha she still has the jewels if she didn’t pawn it. So no, this isn’t justice at all because she still got the better deal in the end.

      1. Profile gravatar of Sarah

        Oh forgot to mention, he did take back the red SUV 🙂

        So altogether he’s only lost the jewels, which was quite a fair bit. No, it’s not worth being beaten up for the jewels. Car or real estate maybe. But not for jewels. Why these sluts could not stick to where their breads are buttered, I don’t know.

  10. Profile gravatar of FHPS

    95% are liars
    95% owe the smaller sibling especially a nagging sister
    95% want to show off to friends
    95% will listen to mother
    95% will use crying, guilt trips and any other shit on you to get what they want
    95% wont know what is “filipino time” and be very attentive, prompt, reliable WHEN THEY WANT SOMETHING.

    foreigner gives cell phone
    younger sister nags as she is still of virgin age to get a 70 year old foreigner (me want, now now now!! your cell phone)
    that white foreigner HE is loaded with cash make him buy me
    no no i feel shame
    ok, STAGE 2 — LIES — say its lost, stolen, broken
    MUM steps in .. yes you look after your daughter, share your blessings (catholic programming)

    please mr foreigner (nagging) buy me a cell phone i lost my last one
    ok ok i will send

    win win
    mr foreigner thinks hes gotten a fuck
    older girl gets new cell phone (so has sister stop nagging)
    younger sister got old cell phone (satisfys her greed and me want now personality for INSTANT GRATIFICATION)

    1. Profile gravatar of Sarah

      First time I went to see my Grandma in Manila since we returned to Oz, I gave her a nice gold necklace. Instead of saying “thank you”, the first words that came out of her mouth was “I wonder how much would this pawn for?”. I never gave her jewelries after that.

      I used to give her money because she only has a small pension….till I found out that she gave my money away to the favorite, lazy free-loading, social climbing grandson.

      She has hypertension (don’t they all!??). One time I decided not to give her any money next time I visited her. But I told her “tell me what you need and I’ll buy them for you, but no cash from me”. I bought her clothes, toiletries, underwear, towels and linens. Plus I bought her 6 month’s worth of medications. But no cash. I got to her province and I heard she was calling all my Aunts and telling them “Sarah did not even leave me a peso”. WTF?? I must have spent P10,000 on her!

      So 5 months later, I was back in Pinas. Grandma ran out of meds before I even got there! “what happened to the meds I bought you?” – I asked. “oh, Auntie Coring has high blood pressure, so I gave some to her” said Grandma.
      No more meds for grandma after that. I told her “if you are going to give away your medications to other people, then you can buy your own”.

      And the clothes I bought for her, lasted about a year. By the time I got back following year, some are torn! ” WTF have you been doing to your clothes, Grandma?” , I asked. “oh, the little grandkids are very rough”. As you can guess, no more clothes for grandma either. In fact, nothing, zero, zilch, because little Sarah here has decided to bypass that money pit called Manila.

      1. Profile gravatar of Beavis
        Beavis Post author

        Yup, because all of those things like meds, clothes, pesos – it all just dropped out of the sky. It’s easy to give away because it was never theirs to begin with.

    1. Profile gravatar of FHPS

      Sarah .. the new site layout looks great i think theres been a theme update but im still getting
      Warning: sprintf(): Too few arguments in /home/jomik12/domains/ on line 153

      error messages too

      1. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
        Captain PFB

        Everything is working perfectly for me. I see everything without problem, no error messages.

        Guys and gals, try clearing your browser cache. Sometimes what is stored in your browser conflicts with a new theme when there’s a theme update.

    1. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
      Captain PFB

      Yeah, the last theme made the whole comment excerpt linked, whereas this theme puts a little chevron link at the end of the excerpt. Gotta click the little cheveron (>>) to view the comment.

      1. Profile gravatar of Captain PFB
        Captain PFB

        I found this theme, thought it looked great, but switched to this theme mainly for the comments section. It doesn’t make the comment replies scrunch up into narrow columns. Thus I can increase the nesting 5+ levels deep (meaning you can now reply on a reply on a reply on a reply ….. without each reply getting more and more narrow and difficult to read.

          1. Profile gravatar of Sarah

            I like the new format too. Easier to follow the comments, it nests. And I can see everything.

  11. Profile gravatar of FHPS

    With narcissists theres different levels;
    Filipinos have the classical – theres only room for the attention to be put on one person! thats them and when you dont give them time, attention money etc if you are in a relationship they use guilt laden tricks like crying and saying they feel shamed by family and friends (which is probably true as they would have a tonne of friends and family directing them how they should live their lives).

    The other thing if theres room for ONE is when you try and have a life in the world of two they will say “you dont care about me”, your selfish, you just think of yourself (haah!! after all the fucking help to the grubs) blah blah
    and then direct the who focus back to THEIR ISSUES, THEIR PROBLEMS, THEIR FRUSTRATIONS and to pull them (and in some cases their family) out of the shit.

    No thanks. Filipina girlfriends. Run!

  12. Profile gravatar of FHPS

    This sound familiar?

    In contrast to the Arrogant/Overt Narcissist,1 the Shy/Covert Narcissist is characterized by vulnerability and sensitivity which manifests itself in defensiveness and hostility. Like the Arrogant/Overt Narcissist, the Shy/Covert Narcissist has grandiose fantasies, feels a sense of entitlement, and is exploitive. However, the Shy/Covert Narcissistic personality is characterized by worry, ineffective functioning, unfulfilled expectations, and vulnerability to stress.
    Cooper summarizes the distinguishing features of the Shy/Covert Narcissist as follows:

    �Covert narcissistic individuals are those whose fantasies, whether conscious or unconscious, are indeed grandiose, inflated, unrealistic, and self-centered. They may be preoccupied with fantasies of grandiose achievements, imagining themselves as world heroes, centers of attention, and acclaimed by all. However, for one of several dynamic reasons, these fantasies are not expressed in overt behavior and are regarded by the individual consciously as beyond attainment. The grandiose desires are not matched by a conviction of personal efficacy. These individuals are conflicted and guilty over their overweening exhibitionistic, competitive, and aggressive desires, and their defensiveness often leads them to suppress or repress any awareness of the existence of these qualities. Most often, a barrier is imposed by a severe inner conscience that finds these fantasies unacceptable, demanding both that they should be suppressed and that the person should feel guilty for harboring unacceptable wishes. In effect, the superego accurately detects that within these self-inflating ideas lie self-centered, aggrandizing desires to attribute all goodness and power to oneself and relegate all weakness and badness to others, an aspect of the angry envy that probably is involved in the genesis of all narcissistic pathology.

    �. . . the patients, like the public at large, may see only the final defensive inhibitory behaviors and perceive themselves as shy and unassertive, unable to obtain what rightfully they deserve. Often, the first hint of their underlying grandiosity comes when one realizes that adolescent types of daydreams of being heroic and acclaimed have persisted into adult life with unusual intensity and frequency. . . . these individuals often think of themselves as �perfectionists� . . . their fantasy of what they ought to be or produce is so inflated and grandiose that no actual product ever meets their internal standard. This discrepancy between unconscious fantasy and reality leads to further guild and merciless attack from the conscience for not meeting self-set standards as well as to feelings of worthlessness concurrent with grandiosity. These individuals often come to the attention of psychiatrists because of the depression and sense of inner deadness that they experience, as nothing in the world matches the thrill of triumphant achievement that they imagine is due them.�2

    A Covert/Shy Narcissist will have grandiose fantasies but will also be plagued by a feeling of unworthiness and thus shame for even having fantasized about his or her �greatness.� This type of narcissist, �is likely to be characterized by an incapacity to sustain ambitions or to pursue even attainable goals with full dedication, yielding to others rewards that he or she may legitimately deserve. The final result is often significant masochistic self-damage, self-pity, feelings of hurt, and depression.�3

    While feeling they deserve to be recognized for their specialness, unlike the Arrogant/Overt Narcissist, the Covert/Shy Narcissist is plagued by self-doubts and thus does not as readily seek the affirmation from others he or she believes is due. Moreover, because of this strong sense of worthlessness, this type of narcissist often will not seek out appropriate friends or romantic partners because they fear exposure as frauds; for this reason their associates tend to be conspicuously inferior to themselves. Cooper observes that this narcissist, �secretly harbors fantasies that he or she is engaged in a heroic rescue of someone of lesser capabilities.�4 And, when their friends and associates offer praise, the Shy/Covert Narcissist believes that this admiration is phony and insincere. They tend to devote a considerable amount of time ruminating over the unfairness of how little their true worth is appreciated and how others get the recognition for things that they themselves did.

    According to Cooper, these people have �pathologically harsh consciences�5 and indulge in self-talk that denigrates their sense of self-worth. In fact, instead of demanding special attention from others in recognition of their superiority, the Shy/Covert Narcissist may actually fawn over people whose accomplishments they envy while secretly harboring strong feelings of resentment and contempt.

    For all these reasons, these people are �frightened to show their accomplishments and often fail to get credit for good work they have actually done. They procrastinate about accomplishing tasks that are well within their capacities but that they fear they cannot accomplish, and their overt demeanor is often excessively retiring, modest, and shy.�6

    1. Profile gravatar of FHPS

      I think one could go a lot deeper getting real life examples of much of whats said above. Simply put the society as a whole has similar programming no matter whether in Mindanao, Luzon or Visayas yet many have not travelled to these other parts of the country yet through the benefit of the internet and chatting to these people from those areas Its easy to draw one conclusion…. its not just in one area, its over the whole fucking country!

    2. Profile gravatar of Beavis
      Beavis Post author

      Yeah, actually covert narcissism is how I stumbled upon this. There was a girl I was seeing about 5 years ago, and she was just another user. She would frequently talk about suicide and stuff, and after knowing her a few months a thought came into my head: “she loves herself way too much to be suicidal”. And yup, she was a covert narcissist.

      1. Profile gravatar of FHPS

        Yepn… Those Asian girls love drama and none more than Filipinos and none more than attention seeking filipinas.

        When the spot light is off them and their problems a great suicide speech is certain to turn things around isn’t it. and consume loads and loads of time and get absolutely nowhere for the advancement of anyone

  13. Profile gravatar of Mike

    My wife would threaten suicide years ago. One day I got tired of it and simple told her “Don’t leave a mess for me to clean up”. That worded and she has not used it since. Yea, I know, I’m an asshole.

  14. Profile gravatar of FHPS

    The mental age of Filipinos is so low. I mean.. Most girls of 20-24 would act like 12-15 year olds in the west. They have such immaturity its so stupid.

    They piece together threads if information and say I’m not like the others and with the same breath asknfor money!!

    Here’s a good article loads of comments too!!

    1. Profile gravatar of Don Quixote
      Don Quixote

      They hear one word in a sentence and that what they remember , then take everything totally out on context.
      Or they forget about everything else in the sentence and remember one word and then say you never said that at all.
      Give me strength

  15. Profile gravatar of FHPS

    HAh true. They hear a word and that’s what they focus on yet don’t understand context. Also they cannot understand ANALOGY
    and IRONY

    …Bloody forget talking to a bag of rocks as all they know of the outside world is Facebook shares (not real news just funny videos and stupid posts) and Filipino soap drama..

  16. Profile gravatar of Sarah

    Yep, Facebook….. I have a few acquaintances from Mum’s province asked me to add them on my FB, which I very rarely access. Why the hell did they asked me for, I have no idea since I don’t do anything with FB either. I find it such a waste of time.

    Anyway, I do check it from time to time for messages and what do I see? they get several pieces of chocolates from an OFW and they post it on FB …. “look what I got! thank you Ate!”, or they get a new cell phone and ….you guessed it! Take a photo and put on FB… they get a new tablet, new jeans, new jewellery, it goes on FB! What a load of mindless pastimes!

    Now if they put as much effort as they do on FB reading books or watching educational documentaries, then they might just learn something. Ah, but that would require a lot of brain cells to process. Something that is so lacking in the Pinoy population. By the way, I hear them pronounced “Facebook” as “pissbok”. 🙂