I usually would not copy and paste an article here. But I could not write the following prose so well. I found this in the Philippines thread on Reddit. With nothing else to say, I present to you far too many Filipinas in bright, living color…
Hate me, but these truths are based on my observations. White American male.
About 8 years ago my company sent me to the Philippines to work in a call Center. I was 38 at the time. I was not your stereotypical balding, overweight white guy. I was in great shape and looked about 5 or 6 years younger than my age.
When I left the USA I was dating a lady in Florida. Nothing serious, there were no commitments made between us.
My company sent me to Cebu first. I stayed at the Marriot and worked for Sykes, (ATT).
I was honestly completely naive to anything about the Philippines before I arrived there. 100% a totally open book. One weird thing I kept seeing at my hotel, was old, foreign men with beautiful young filipina women. It hit me as totally strange that they would be hugging and kissing on these gross old guys, but no one else seemed to bat an eye.
I went to the call center my first night there and it was kind of like being a Hollywood star walking into an auditorium filled with fans. It was overwhelming how much attention I got.
Young, pretty girls, and gays, would constantly ask me questions and when I came over to answer them, would wrap themselves around my arm, resting their heads on my shoulders. I felt very uncomfortable with that level of physical affection.
My first night there I noted a girl sitting off to the side. I thought she was beautiful and talked to her just enough to find out that she had almost no accent and seemed very smart.
That night I went back to my hotel and met a guy in the elevator with one of the most beautiful women Ive ever seen on his arm. He asked me if I had a girlfriend yet, and I told him I did, back home. I honestly did not know what he was talking about.
My next night at the call center I found out that the girl I had met, Lin, had been fired. I was very dissapointed.
For lunch that night, (4 am), a bunch of the call center workers took me across the street to an alley where 3 ladies were cooking over an open fire and I had my first Liempo. They taught me to crush peppers into a mix of soy and vinegar and I thought it was one of the best things Id ever eaten,.. and for only $1 american dollar!
A few weeks went by and and we decided to have a work based get together with one of the call center teams. We rented a boat and went from Cebu to the island of Pandanon off of the coast. Lin was there because her friends at the call center had invited her and I was pretty smitten. I shared one earpiece of my headphones with her on the Jeepney to the dock, and then on the boat ride across. We brought Lechon and hanging rice with us, and someone cooked Conch when we got to the island.
After a few hours the group began to head back to the boat to leave, but Lin and two of her friends asked me if, instead, Id like to take a trip to Bojol for 2 days. I thought this was great and said yes.
We paid a fisherman to take us across and after a couple of hours, hit the beach on Bojol. Once there we triked, jeepneyed and taxied around the island until finally we found a resort on the north side that had one room left with two beds. I took 1 bed and the three girls took the other.
Early in the morning I woke up and saw how crowded that bed was. I shook Lin awake and told her to take mine, and I went down to the beach and fell asleep in a beach chair.
I woke to the most beautiful site I have ever seen: the sun rising lit the water with orange rays. All of the boats were painted the same white color and parked the same distance out from the beach and the sands were the whitest I have ever seen in my life. I will never forget that image.
After a bit the girls came down in their swimsuits and a group of filipino guys surrounded them, hitting on them inappropriately. I went down to them and when I got there, the guys left. We just hung out and talked and it was wonderful.
On the ferry home I had a chance to talk to Lin and I told her this; “for 3 days now I have not been further than 20 feet from you. When you fell asleep in the jeepney, you rested your head on my shoulder for 3 hours and it hurt so bad, but I didnt want to move because It was so wonderful. Now we are going back home, and I am going to miss this”, Her answer; ” I was not asleep”.
I went back to my hotel and a couple of hours later there was a knock at my door. Lin was there, she came into my room, and we slept together.
Lin was 24, I was 38. I had never even thought of dating someone that much younger than me, but she was more mature than women I had met that were in their late 30s. It felt right.
She was very respectful of anyone she met, and together we went and explored all over the island.
After a few months I was relocated to Manila and I took her with me. I would go to work at 4am, and return home around noon. My new call center was in glorietta mall, but i walked through Greenbelt to get there. I was loving life and loving the culture. I would get home and she would be there and we would go back to bed. Around 5 pm we would get up and go to Greenhills or somewhere and I found tons of foods and things to do.
I began to really love the Philippines. The people were incredibly nice all the time. I felt like it was the place I wanted to live for the rest of my life.
It was about this time that I realized something wasnt right. I finally caught Lin talking to another foreigner, overseas, and realized that she had been dating him when she met me and hadnt broken it off. I talked to him and he told me that she was his “GF” when he was in the country and he essentially paid her to be there for him. She and I got in a huge fight and I sent her back to Cebu. I was heartbroken.
1 week later was my birthday. I got home that morning and Lin was there waiting for me with a cake, candles, balloons and the hotel staff to sing happy birthday. Im sure it was nice, but I was still heartbroken so sent her home again within a few hours. Thus began my experimentation with the seedy side of Manila life.
That night I went out and met two girls. I took them back to my room and slept with them both. After they left, a call center girl called and asked if she could come by. I slept with her. A few hours later another girl stopped by randomly, and I slept with her. Later I went to Wendys in the mall, brought a girl back, and slept with her.
At the end of that day I had slept with 6 women in the space of one day, Lin included.
The next day off I first visited a brothel and slept with a girl there. I went back once more and slept with two more.
It didnt take me long to realize that this was a horrible way to live. I got no pleasure out of this behavior after the immediate pleasure. There was no long-term positiveness to this. It was pointless and way too easy. Just because I was decent looking, white and possibly better off money-wise than most locals, I had girls up to my eyeballs. On the walk to work each night, Pokpoks would hand me their business cards. Id go to work with 3 or so new ones every night. The Filipino guys I worked with that walked pretty much the same route said they had never received a single one.
Then I met Fran.
By appearance, Fran seemed younger than Lin, but I later found out she was 5 years older. I talked to her at work for a couple weeks before ever going out with her. I stopped seeing any other girls the day I first met her, just by coincidence. I had had enough of that worthless lifestyle.
We dated until I left the Philippines 2 years later and when I got back to the USA I began working on her K1 Visa.
2 years later she joined me here and we were married.
The day after we married I was contacted by her “boyfriend” in the Philippines who accused me of stealing his girl and told me that for the last year, everytime I was on skype with her, he sat nearby listening.
My heart was broken again. I also found out through her friends that I was not her first foreigner. They told me stories about them visiting her after I left. A German guy and an Australian. I was blown away. I had never suspected anything. It felt like complete betrayal.
The next year was an absolute living hell. 3 months would be great with her being very loving and seemingly committed only to have her go crazy throwing and breaking things. I realized she was depressed because she wasnt working and couldnt go anywhere on her own.
I had met with her father in the Philippines and his words were; “we do not believe in divorce here. Your culture divorces too easily. Please do not do that to my daughter”. I made him a promise that I would respect his culture and, although there were very bad times, I decided to work through them. What did I really have to lose?
Recently my wife has started to work and to drive. She has pinay friends here and seems to be a lot happier. I am not 100% happy, and still suspicious, but my christian beliefs do not allow me to view divorce frivolously. I intend to try until I simply cant anymore.
So here is my point:
I see a lot of posts here about filipinas and their interest in Old white guys with money.
How would you feel, and react, If you were just a normal guy in your home country, but you landed somewhere else and were instantly a rock star? How long could you control yourselves if half the women you met threw themselves at you? I can tell you that I am a good person and I found it impossible. The temptation was too great.
There are two sides to every story. I do not condone old white men going to a country to take advantage of a younger women, but that is also a two edged sword. Those young brown girls are taking just as much of an advantage from the old white guys.
If there wasnt a product, there would be no buyers.
I love your country. I fell in love with the chaotic traffic. I hated the slums. I felt sorry for my friends who slept outside because there was no A/C at home. Or my friend who had a gaping hole in her roof and had to stand her mattress up against a wall to get it from being rained on while she was at work.
Your country is so wonderfuly crazy, complex and beautiful. Your people are caring, and warm and genuine and dangerous and sneaky and trying to better themselves in ways that are not for the best. But I understand why they do it.
Your government is fucked. I was in Hawaii as a kid when the Marcos’ moved there. I had filipino friends who supported them monetarily because they could not live in the lifestyle they were used too.
I have been lucky enough to have lived all over the world. I would travel for the rest of my life if I could. Of all the places Ive ever been, the Philippines is my favorite. When I land there I feel like I have gone to a different planet. The smells, the colors, the crowdidness…. its all so Filipino.
You have some major problems, but do not blame old white guys for taking young brown girls home when the girls are climbing into their laps. Blame the girls just as much.
I feel very self conscious when Im out with my wifes friends here and their husbands because of the age differences between some of them. Its so obvious to me that they are married as an arrangement, not out of love. One guy is 50 years older than his wife, and thats just sick.
But Ive been the most unhappy of all of them. My non-arranged, non-dating site, non-mail order bride wife has been the worst of all the girls she hangs with. Most of them are working out without half the drama that I have.
Hopefully this does not go over as negative. My stay in your country was incredibly positive. I wish I was there today, but I have children from a prior marriage here and my immediate loyalty is to them.
Please forgive any typos. Im at work and have not had a chance to go over it, looking for errors.Published in