What I Know About Filipino Women Pt 1

I grew up in the military community. A lot of military guys were married to Filipinos back in the 80s because the US bases were still in full force.  My mom, a Proud Filipina, moved to the U.S. after marrying my father.  Luckily for her, she didn’t have to change her attitude at all.  She was surrounded by other ignorant, greedy, dishonest Filipinas who have all married their way into the United States.

Per usual, my mother tracked my every move.  It gave her a false sense of power so she dragged me to her get togethers with her friends.  No matter who she was talking with, where we were living or what year it was, the conversations remained the same: bitch about the stupid Kano husband and figure out a way to milk more money out of his family to send back to PI.

I am now grown and still within the military community.  I happened to be on a duty station where a lot of Filipino wives happen to be stationed, also, and let me tell you: NOTHING HAS CHANGED. It’s like I’m 5 years old again and I’m listening to my mom and her friends.

Here’s a list of the tried and true statements I’ve heard for over 20 years:

1) MONEY! Does this surprise you? I didn’t think so. Money, money, money.  How to get more of it, how to spend more of it, how to steal it, how to send it home….everything you can do with money (except save it!) is discussed.  There is this concept that they’re “lucky” to have made it to the U.S. so they have an obligation to their less fortunate family members back home.

The big reason they send money back home is to gloat.  They’re living with running water (that runs 24 hours everyday!), healthcare and government  programs that provide way more than they should.  The irony of all of this is they bitch continuously about anything American but HATE the idea of living in the shit hole that is the Philippines ever again.  They love their cushy lives in the States. They hate America but I guess it’s the lesser of two evils in their eyes.

imagePayday on base is INSANE.  I went the other day to buy baby formula and was astounded at the lines. On payday, an hour after the exchange opened, the lines were 10-12 people deep. No, these were not other mommies buying formula; these were Filipinas buying Michae Kors bags and Coach sunglasses.  It was disgusting to see them strut around in tacky fucking sweats and a $2,000 purse?! Like shit…if you’re going to have a designer purse, at least look like you put a little effort in your appearance.  The average Filipina woman treats fashion like filipino men treat earning a living for his family: it only takes one to do the job of many.  Honey, a Coach purse or some gold bangles will not rescue your look from looking totally trashy.

The husbands of these wives are always scraping by a week after payday because it’s been spent. ALL OF IT. He’s borrowing money from coworkers for haircuts or skipping lunch because he can’t afford it.  It’s disgusting.

One thing that surprises me to still be true is the Filipina’s perspective on intimacy.  We all know they are devoid of any ability of really connect with someone so sex is just a means of bringing in income for them.  They get together and joke about how they hold out for two days out of the month: payday. Their husbands are literally paying for sex.  I had a Filipino neighbor who caught me on my way out the door and bitched how she needed to shave her legs because it’s pay day.  She  rolled her eyes and made it seem like she was off to a hard day’s work by having sex with her husband.  There’s an old saying, those who marry for money, earn it.

Now, not all of the money goes to their ridiculous shopping trips.  That’s just what their husbands think. They’re also at the western union sending money back home.  Then they hit the clearance DESIGNER purse/clothes racks to fill balikbayan boxes. They never tell their husbands and I don’t think their husbands think anything is amiss; especially since they’re living in their twice a month coitus glow during this time.

I have heard countless Filipinas talk sooooo much shit on their generous, oblivious husbands.  It’s almost like they think he deserves to be taken advantage of if he’s going to be this stupid. It’s really sad to see them spend $300 on a Kate Spade purse for their piece of shit sister back home but won’t spend more than $30 on a birthday gift for their husband.

These women are not in love with their husbands; they’re not even in love with LOVE.  They’re in love with the security and financial freedom a husband with a steady income  provides.  They use these poor guys & it’s really heartbreaking to see.  They think because I’m half Filipino, that I agree with what they do and I guess that’s why they talk so openly around me.

Money isn’t everything.  But money is about RESPECT.  Respect for the hard work you’ve done, respect for your generosity to share it with others.  Nothing is free. It’s like Filipinos think Americans get money for no work.  Someone has to work for it; they just go to extremes measures to make sure it’s not them.

Published in Filipina Wife, Filipino Stupidity


  1. Profile gravatar of Steve Declerck
    Steve Declerck

    When I see my wife and all her useless pinay friends together, I am alays wondering what they might be talking about. To me it looks like a kindergarten, non stop laughing, joking, laughing again, noise all the time, pfffff. You mean they talk all this shit when they are together ? Money, money, scamming,… they should be ashamed of themselves.

    You are right about intimacy, me too I always felt I was paying for it. Years ago, I was also sending money to her parasite relatives, and giving my bank card to my wife for shopping. She was soooooo sweet. But when I stopped it, years ago, the sweetness was finished.

    And it’s true, she would spent whatever needed for her useless relatives, but a week before my birthday arrived, she told me: “sorry no gift, I don’t have money”. She even reminded me a week before. I’m not greedy and I’m not looking for gifts, but just to say such a shit says it all….

  2. Profile gravatar of CantFixStupid

    My ex wife is pinay… she now lives and works in the u.s., and gets to work her own job to send to useless relatives. While we were married, I told her that sending money to your family should also set them up for success. They did in fact put up a sari sari plus calenderia. Now they’re self sufficient which is good. She still gets requests from her brother though, i swear filipinos native dudes are shameless.

    My current fiancee actually contributes and pays for things related to her family out of her own earnings. She still has the “i owe my parents everything” mindset, but she limits what she can contribute monetarily. Good thing is her father actually works construction and her sisters and brothers work (one brother being the exception who i’d like to very much never see). All in all not too terrible, i’m in country a few more months.

    Getting out of here by end of this year (with fiancee and babies). Already mentioned a visit every 3 years and that was agreeable to her. I actually like her family, just hate the Phils due to the corruption, noise, and mindless dumbasses which fills it.

  3. Profile gravatar of Barry Smyth
    Barry Smyth

    Yep you hit it on the head and you are so correct money is all they think about and talk about.and how it get it without working just like the sluts in the bars etc how can she bang so many guys then a dumb stiff comes along tells her how he lovers her so much and the sky is the limit.
    This is the Q she is waiting for the moneyko has arrived its her dream now to start to milk it for all its worth.
    Over the past 34 years associated with Filipino’s I have a load of stories to tell about them and not just bars girls they are what they are.

  4. Profile gravatar of Pinay Lover
    Pinay Lover

    The major thing i despise is someone inabling laziness and throwing all their earnings away to parasites. Thats the part of the “culture” that is so corrupt. I dont know how these women can be such money wasters.

    They leech and sink themselves and those around them. Filipina = luggage.

  5. Profile gravatar of

    I’ve met in Australia women like this, but I will have to say I’ve met a lot nicer women in the Philippines who may act this was but lucky for me I was forewarned. don’t take the bird from the forest
    It doesn’t even seem to matter what they have in Australia they act the same, it is Shocking!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I met my Filipino neighbor who has been in OZ for over 28 years. Who is VERY WELL OFF after a brief period I asked her to introduce my wife to some local women so she didn’t get lonely.
    She was horrified. WARNED me away very fast, to stay away from the Philippine mafia as she put it. HER WORDS.
    They are only interested in what you have so they can get some of it and they will do anything to break up a marriage just on the chance you may pick up with one of them.
    We went to watch a couple of Paquio fights and I did note that although there were lots of Filipino viewers there they all seemed to be alone, like a single mothers group.
    May be the husbands were at work, but it was a Sunday.

  6. Profile gravatar of Philophobe

    The first time it was great to visit my girlfriend there…but at some point i couldn’t get excited anymore to go there because i always had to do it with 20kg of Pasalubong and couldn’t spend time with my partner anymore without having at least three people following us around all the time and which i would treat 24/7. When i said i didn’t like it this way, the answer was always “it’s just like that here”.

    Is that really the hospitality they were talking about? And has anyone of you experienced similar things?

    1. Profile gravatar of Steve Declerck
      Steve Declerck


      Yes I experienced exactly the same. My then wife to be was dragging me around to visit all of her relatives. And sometimes there was quite some distance between them. Spending half of the day inside jeepneys. At one point I got so tired of it. That day we had to visit yet another aunt. I just entered the house and didn’t say a word to anybody. After a while I noticed that aunt started to make fun of me. After we left, my GF complained “you don’t like my family??”. Jesus we’re already traveling around the whole week, just to see your aunts, uncles and all the rest of the shit clan. When we didn’t travel around, there were always brothers, sisters, mother with us and like you said, it was just normal that everything would be payed. They would eve ask money because they couldn’t pay the jeepney fare to go back. At the wedding, more than 100 leechers showed up, bringing their friends with them who were not even invited, without blinking an eye. I don’t call it hospitality, it’s rudeness.

      And whenever I made comments to my GF, the same answer : “It’s like that here”. Morons….

      1. Profile gravatar of 30-30

        been there,,, done that,,,, after the 10 visis to some hovel,,, hands stretched out,, hotter than 7 shades of hell,, jeepneys,, provincial buses,,, a perfect reicipe for a meltdown in a nut house.
        I even had a flip show up at my wedding (uninvited)to talk about getting a visa to my home country!!!!!!!!!!! WFT
        is alive and well

      2. Profile gravatar of Philophobe

        As the saying goes: “Here in the Philippines, we really don’t let our guests do anything” (except for the fact that you’ll pay for everything that we and our 100 gate-crashing guests that you don’t know may desire).

      3. Profile gravatar of Pinay Lover
        Pinay Lover

        The Filipinos view concerning parents is bizarre. Even if your wife was raped, beat, mentally, emotionally abused, used as a pawn for money, mocked, made fun of, disowned by her parents and family, she would still say “well, they are my parents. I have to respect them”

        The problem with Filipinos is that they don’t seem to respect themselves enough to see between the lines that their parasite family is nothing more than that…..parasites. What do we want to do when we have parasites ravaging our bodies? We want to RID THEM!

        But Filipinos are open arms to corruption, abuse, and family dis-function. “It’s just that way in the Philippines!” is always the answer.

        Fuck, if there were babies getting raped all over the streets, they would openly accept that as “well, that’s just the way it is in the Philippines.”. Doesn’t matter how fucked up it is over there, they just accept it all with open arms and if you happen to point out the wrongness they simply threaten your life! Just about the lowest form of reaction. Instead of having an intelligent argument to prove your points wrong, they simply say “that is just how it is in the Philippines” or “I’m going to kill you for saying that”.

        2 childish responses. But the majority are just that…children.

    2. Profile gravatar of vinzz

      Thats’a stuff i wanted to talk about too.
      When we are in Pi, it’s almost impossible to organize anything without tons of relatives around.
      For example : want to to a picnic to the beach with my wife & the kids & the mother in law : we are gathered almost 20 people, nobody will bring something, guess who will pay the bus or the van going there.
      Once we are at the sea, i need to buy food, i leave $$ to the sister of my wife & tell her to buy stuff at the japanese cattering wich look fresh & relatively cheap :My ass, she just bring back full of fastfood shit, with many polyesther package, not even 1 centavo for change : The cost of a picnic, feedind people i even dont know was like the price of a restaurant.

      1. Profile gravatar of Phil Doh
        Phil Doh

        Thankfully my wife has never felt the urge to invite the whole family to any trip we plan together.

        Before her I dated another filipina briefly and it was just ridiculous. We planned a trip to the beach one day, me thinking it was just the two of us, then: is it ok if my sister comes along? Ok, whatever. What about her two kids? Fair enough. Is it ok if uncle dingdong comes? He has a jeepney and can drive us there. Said jeepney makes multiple stops along the way picking up more family members. Before I know it I’m paying the entrance fee to the resort for 15 family members. Then bingbong grabs the menu and orders a fucking feast for over 3000 plus pesos, without even asking me what I’d like to eat. When the bill came I was so pissed off I just slammed down a 1000 and told them to settle the rest between themselves while I went for a swim.

        Give them an inch they’ll take a mile.

    1. Profile gravatar of Philophobe

      Sure won’t, we’ll all be better off as free men. I wish i would’ve found this page earlier, it really takes away your last bit of sympathy for this people. And if there’s still a desire improve others’ lives, charitable organizations will surely manage to allocate that money more efficiently.

  7. Profile gravatar of mira

    That is the very reason why i stayed away from my so called relatives who calls me as a relative only because i did well in life and got a good job in another country and married a japanese. i went to ph a couple of times secretly. because i know that they would all come and act like they want to see me but actually they want money or present. Even being here in japan now i stay away from filipinos because i was warned by my aunt who lives in london. I experiened filipinos asking for donations at the immigration here in japan then when i told them i was not catholic they started bad mouthing me. As for being dragged around by your gf to meet their whole family, it not about introducing you to be honest but to show off as well that they have finally succeded in having a foreign husband or boyfriend. As for the relative its anot about meeting you but knowing your a foriegner would make them think that you have money and money is nothing for you. you see if you give them its not enough, if you don’t, you are not a good partner so sometimes its better not to give. Just set a limit and tell your partner that you have your own family now and you need to focus taking care of her than taking care of others. (that’s what i tell my mom whom i did not grow up with when she is moaning about money, i tell her i have my family and she has hers. let me fix mine and ask her husband),.

    1. Profile gravatar of Steve Declerck
      Steve Declerck


      You seem a very wise woman. I didn’t know it was about showing off when I had to meet all those relatives. Anyway, when I think of it now, she was acting snobbish, walking in the street with me, with her head high in the air.

      I have an acquaintance who is just back from Philippines with his wife. Upon arrival there, it didn’t take long before he had an argument with his wife. They had a long flight, so they were happy to go to the hotel in Manila and take a rest. But no way, within a short while, suddenly the entire family showed up in the hotel. And they didn’t leave anymore. All of them (and they were many) just slept on the floor inside that same hotel room as the couple. Of course looking for gifts and money. The man was furious, but the wife didn’t say anything about it to her relatives. Those people really cannot think what is polite and what is not ?

      And you are very, very right about this : “You give something, it’s not enough. You stop giving, you’re a bad one.” That’s exactly what happened with my wife. I was giving but she always gave me the feeling it was not enough. Because of that, I stopped giving and now I’m the asshole husband. That time I didn’t have a savings account. Now I have and also my kids have and that’s the most important, the future.

      Have a nice day

      1. Profile gravatar of

        I remember when I was very young PI, Mum had a “Kumare” (Godmother to one of us) from the islands. One day, Mum was away leaving me with my siblings at home with the maid. I was playing downstairs when suddenly I saw these people arriving and entered our house. There were about 12 or 13 of them carrying baskets and sacks and bags etc. I have never seen them all my life! When Mum arrived, she was shocked to learn that the Kumare brought her relatives to our house to sleep because they had nowhere else to sleep in the city! Did she asked Mum first? NO! We were only living in a 3 bedroom house back then, we got to keep our rooms thank God! But next couple of nights, there were bodies lying asleep all over the floors! Every time we step out out of our rooms, there were bodies in the living room, even under the kitchen table!

        The “guests” were allowed free run of the kitchen. They cooked (using our gas) and ate everything from the refrigerator and pantry. I could tell Mum was not happy, but did not say anything to the “Kumare”. We were relieved when they finally left 2 days later! That was long enough! My Dad would have hit the roof if he found out, but he was working back in Australia.

        I don’t know if Mum had a word with her friend, because they sure did not do it again. But turning up unannounced is another Filipino trait, and yes, if you’re Kano you pay for their fares back home. Mother in law coming for very long extended visits is another thing. But that’s another story…

        1. Profile gravatar of Philophobe

          As the saying goes: “Here in the Philippines, we really don’t let our guests do anything” (except for the fact that you’ll pay for everything that we and our 100 gate-crashing guests that you don’t know may desire).

    2. Profile gravatar of Philophobe

      My trick to set limits was to give my own mother access to my bank account, and she only allows for a certain fixed amount of “support”. Highly recommended if you’re still into this, because it leaves no room for discussions.

  8. Profile gravatar of FHPS

    Why the fuck in the last 10 years (nothings changed by the way as expected) when i am on dating sites do filipinas ask:

    1. whos there with you now?
    2. so are you there with your wife?

    why the fuck if i was married would i be on a dating-fucking-site. Why? why do they ask that?
    Thats an instant fail!. Why are they so stupid to think i am married
    and i reply im here with my 18 year old wife
    and they reply
    “arr ok”
    and think nothing of it.

    arr ok
    ar ok
    argh ok
    ar okk
    see how many variations of speaking filipino i have learnt!

  9. Profile gravatar of Skywalker

    Gosh damn seriously. This is the first time it hit me, but I’ve noticed this common thread now with Philippina women. They tend to be over focused on money, defending their “turf”, and how to take it from others. I went to a hair salon; the Philippian women there would always try to upsell me and get extra cash by waxing my eyebrows. I let her, but found out later she wasn’t even certified to do it (she ended up burning me), she just wanted whatever extra money she could get. Later she had an argument with the health inspector (good luck with that bitch) and ended up being shut down.

    A Philippian woman I know was recently “caring” for two elderly women in her home. They both paid her something to the tune of $4,000/month (this was a rate she negotiated); this means she was probably making around $7,000-$8,000 a months for a work at home job. She would work in her pajamas and spend most of her time gardening. One elderly woman was left to sit in her own urine with dirty clothes. The other one (who had dementia) was literally locked in her bedroom; the doorknob was removed by Philippian lady and she used a sheet to tie the door shut, treating her like some animal. Despite all of this money, the Philippian lady bitched that she could do much better than taking care of these women, that she could get rid of them anytime, and that they were lucky to have her. One elderly woman (the one without dementia) decided she’d had enough and wanted to give her 30 day notice so she could go to a better caretaker (who charged much less). The Philippian lady flipped out, and at the end begged the elderly woman to stay. She didn’t. When the elderly woman (a family member of mine) decided to follow through on leaving, the Philippian lady made criminal threats and placed harassing phone calls to all members of the elderly woman’s family, making up stories about different people stealing large amounts of money from the elderly lady and causing all sorts of problems. The police literally had to help the elderly woman move out for her own protection.

    So yeah, all in all, I’m fed up with this Philippian bullshit drama, and their money grubbing ingratitude. They should go back to their own shithole of a country and quit taking our jobs and positions, which they obviously aren’t happy with (even though they’re damn lucky to have them).

    Even though it’s not quite the Philippines (but close), these situations remind me of documentary Daughter from Danang: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2AU_VUe2HX0

    A half white half Vietnamese baby was adopted out and basically grew up completely Americanized/Westernized. When she went back to visit her Vietnamese family of origin, she was shocked by the cultural differences, some of which included relatives who would demand money, even though they barely knew her. Even though she sought them out, she ended up so offended she did not want to maintain contact with them (she understandably felt used at their entitlement mentality). A really interesting documentary to watch, well worth the time.